Before your maid arrives, you should prepare a list of house rules. Be as specific as possible. This will help your maid understand your expectations better. Explain to your maid the first day she arrives at your house. Give her a copy so that she can refer to.
I have included the house rules and timetables contributed by Lani and Are . You can find the links at the right column of this blog.
Do review your timetable and task list and make sure that it is reasonable. Ask yourself, are you able to do all those tasks ? If you cannot, then don't expect the maid to be able to do it. The maid is just a human being like you and me.
You can have very specific house rules of your own, there is no need to follow others. For example, I had specific pails for washing baby's clothes, adult clothes cannot be put into those pails. I also had separate towels for wiping the floor and the table. My maid is strictly not allowed to use the washing machine for her own clothes. I knew some families disallow the maid to use the water heater for shower, but I do allow my maid to use the water heater. All these house rules should be written down and explained to the maid on the first day that she arrives.
These house rules are meant for the maid to know how to perform well on her job. I do not punish the maid if she forgets to follow any of the rules. I just show her the list to remind her. I reward the maid if she follows all the rules.
Some employers think that they should not be too strict to the maid. However, we never know what kind of maid we will get. It makes better sense to be very strict when the maid first arrives, then slowly relax the rules if necessary after we know the maid better. If we give too much freedom to the maid at first, it will be very difficult to restrict her later.
Having a maid does not mean that she must do everything, and you must not do anything at all. There are employers who do not even pour themselves a cup of water, they must ask the maid to do it. I still make my own coffee in the morning.
If you like things to be done in a certain way which is very important to you, then you should still do it yourself. For example, I am very particular about how my own clothes should be washed, dried and ironed. Tops and bottoms must be washed separately. Light and dark colored clothes also must be separated. I don't trust my maid to do it, so I still do it myself. My hubby does not allow my maid to touch anything on his work table full of electronic gadgets. He cleans it himself. That does not mean that my maid is very free. She is already busy enough cooking, keeping the house clean, and looking after our 2 kids.
Some employers think that because they employ a maid, they must make "maximum" use of her. Remember that maids are human too. We should not make her work every second of the day.
Detail Instructions
Do not expect the maid to know how you want things to be done. For example, tell her exactly how much washing detergent to use, how many times you want her to rinse the clothes.
If the maid is forgetful, write down all instructions on paper, and paste near the place she is working, so she can refer to it.
Working Performance Appraisal
You should always feedback to your maid about her performance, right from the very first day. It's best to tell her immediately if she has made a mistake, do not keep it to yourself and feel unhappy about it. Tell her matter of factly, in a cool and calm manner, and show her the correct way of doing things.
One employer I know from Singaporemotherhood forum, has written an excel file for her maid's performance appraisal. I think it is a pretty good idea. If you have a google account, you can view the file here.
appraisal.xls
The maid must be supervised at all times
If the maid is taking care of new born babies, or very young children who still cannot talk, you must make sure that there is someone to supervise the maid at all times. Every maid will act like they love your baby very much in front of you, but you will never know what they do behind your back. Remember that your baby will not be able to tell you what the maid has done to him.
A mommy took a shocking video of the maid kicking her 2 month old baby. It was broadcast in the news in every channel on Feb 4 2008. View the story and photos here.
http://singaporeseen.stomp.com.sg/singaporeseen/viewContent.jsp?id=13554
Fortunately the baby did not suffer any physical injuries. But any mommy will be devastated if this happened to their own baby. Even if you installed a webcam at home, by the time you found out, the damage has already been done.
If you don't have anyone to supervise the maid at home, then you should consider putting your baby in the infant care center. Then hire a local part time maid to do housework.
Do not put your baby's life in danger !
How well should you treat the maid ?
You should treat the maid, in the same way that your boss treats you. Many people think that if they treat the maid like part of the family, the maid will be grateful and work hard. The fact is that, not all maids will be grateful.
I always make it clear to my maid, that I am the employer, she is the employee. She must follow my house rules and instructions. This is how I treat my maid. I think this is very fair to her.
1. I make sure my kids respect her, like any other adults at home. They must say thank you, please and sorry to her. I also do the same, to set a good example for my kids.
2. I never read her letters, and I never search her belongings.
3. I let her call home as and when she likes, so long as she is using her own phone card, and she has completed all her task, and she must ask my permission.
4. I make sure she has enough food and at least 8 hours of sleep. I also try to let her have some rest time in the afternoon.
5. I celebrate her birthday for her, buy her a birthday cake and present.
6. When we go out to eat, she sit with us and eat the same food.
7. If she has performed well, I will give her rewards like a big hong bao on Chinese New Year
You can be nice to your maid, but never treat your maid like a friend. You must always make it clear that you are the employer.
Your maid's food and groceries
I separate my maid's food from the rest of the family. For example, she drinks those 3-in-1 coffee pack, while I drink expensive UCC and illy coffee. She eats NTUC bread, while I eat Gardenia bread. She eats selar fish, while I eat salmon and cod fish.
Remember that company CEOs fly first class when he/she travels, while other employees fly economy class.
Of course, it is still up to you. If you are rich enough to share your salmon and bird's nest with your maid, then go ahead ! I have heard of employers who had to buy the cheapest jam for the whole family, just because they were afraid that the maid would eat a lot of jam. This is not necessary.
You can control the amount of food that your maid eats. Some maids, especially those with no previous work experience, may eat a lot when they first arrived in Singapore. I used to have a maid who finished a whole tin of Milo (1400g) in one week.
I made it clear to my maid, that I will only buy one tin of Milo(1400g) for one month. If she finished it early, then she will have no Milo for the rest of the month. I do not restrict the amount of bread and rice that my maid eats. So far none of my maids like to eat a lot of bread or rice. If your maid eats too much rice, then you can decide what is a reasonable amount for her, like 2 bowls of rice should be more than enough for any adult woman.
I also buy basic toiletries like shampoo and shower gel for my maid. I gave her extra $10 every month to buy her own sanitary pads. There are many other employers who do not buy any toiletries for their maids, so it is up to you. There is no need to provide her with facial cleanser, moisturizer, etc since these are not necessary.
Off day or no off day ?
No one can work everyday for years without any rest. I advise employers to give off days to their maids whenever possible.
No one can work everyday for years without any rest. I advise employers to give off days to their maids whenever possible.
Employers who have babies, very young kids, or elderly who needs constant care, may not be able to give off days to their maids. In this case, try to make sure that your maid has some free time to rest. At least one hour every day, or a few hours during the weekends without being disturbed. Let her have the freedom to call her family or friends.
A maid who works everyday without any rest is very likely to develop mental illness. This happened to 2 of my ex-maids.
Some employers are concerned that the maid will get pregnant if she finds a boyfriend outside. All maids must go through medical checkup every 6 months. Once she tested positive for pregnancy, immediately send her back and you will not lose your security bond.
Some employers are concerned that the maid may mix with other maids who may teach her bad things. This is something that we cannot control. If the maid is a good maid, she will not be influenced by her friends.
I also do not ask my maid where she goes and what she does during her off day. She is only working for me for a salary, I have no right to control her life when she is not working for me.
Your maid's salary
Please read the following guidelines from MOM.
Salary
She must be paid her due salary each month, no later than seven days after the last day of the salary period. Any salary period agreed between the employer and worker shall not exceed one month. If the worker so requests, the salary shall be paid via direct transfer into the worker's bank account in a bank established in Singapore.
If it is mutually agreed that the employer should keep the bank account book, the FDW must be given access to the book at all times to check that payments are credited promptly and regularly.
The employer must also keep a record of the monthly salary paid to the FDW, and should be able to produce this record at the request of any public officer.
If it is mutually agreed that the employer should keep the bank account book, the FDW must be given access to the book at all times to check that payments are credited promptly and regularly.
The employer must also keep a record of the monthly salary paid to the FDW, and should be able to produce this record at the request of any public officer.
Many employers do not like their maid to keep any cash. These employers will keep their maid's salary until the maid finishes the contract and goes back home. If the maid need to buy anything or send money back home, she will inform the employer to do it for her. The employer will keep a log book to record down the salary, spending, and balance. If you choose to do this, then make sure that your maid signs an agreement. Take note that according to MOM, you must pay her salary within 7 days.
In my case, I opened a bank account for my maid. It is her personal account, and I let her keep her bank book. She does not want to have ATM card. Every month I will use internet to transfer her salary into her bank account. On her off day, she goes and update her bank book.
I have heard an employer worrying that the maid will withdraw money from her bank account and run away. So the employer thinks that she should open a joint account with the maid. But the truth is that, if the maid wants to run away, she will do so even if she doesn't have a single cent in her pocket.
Sending money back to her own country
I used Western Union. It is very easy. The maid gives me the name of the person who will receive the money in her country. I bring this name to the Post Office Western Union counter. Each transaction fee is $12. I will be issued a number. I just pass this number to the maid who then informs her family member to bring this number to collect the money immediately.
Telephone Calls / Letters
If your maid is taking care of your baby or toddler, you should not allow her to use her mobile phone when she is working. Maids love to talk with their friends, and they can chat on the phone all day long if you give them the freedom. It is very annoying, and very disturbing if she is taking care of your baby, she will not be able to concentrate on her work.
My maid is strictly not allowed to use her mobile phone when she is working during the day.
I advise employers to remove IDD from their home telephone. Your maid may talk for hours to her family in her home country without you knowing, especially if you leave your maid alone at home.
You should use www.skype.com. It is very very cheap compared to IDD. It allows you to talk to someone, for example, in USA, from your PC to his PC, completely free of charge. You can also call someone's on his telephone(mobile or fixed line) overseas at extremely cheap rates.
I allow my maid to send as many letters as she likes to her family. I don't believe in cutting off her communication completely. She is allowed to call her family using her own mobile phone as often as she likes, so long as she has completed all her task, and she must ask my permission.
Where should you maid sleep ?
The following is written on MOM website :
Employer Guidelines
Accommodation
"Where possible, your FDW should be given a separate room of her own. In the event that is not possible, you should ensure that sufficient space for sleep is provided. You are also expected to provide her with basic needs (e.g. food, a bed with mattress, a blanket, towels and toiletries, a fan if the sleeping area has poor ventilation etc).
Some examples of improper accommodation include making your FDW sleep in places where there is little privacy, such as on makeshift beds along the corridor or in the living room, or sharing a room with a male adult."
Note that there is no rule stated by MOM that you must give your maid a separate room. It is very common for maids to sleep with the children, or in the bomb shelter. Just make sure that the room is well ventilated and is quiet enough for her to get a good rest at night.
Will I lose my privacy with the maid around ?
My house rules disallow my maid to open any of our cupboards or touch anything on our shelves without my permission. My maid is also not allowed to enter any bedrooms without permission. When she has nothing to do, she stays in the kitchen, or inside her own room(she sleeps in the bomb shelter). She does not appear unless I call her. This does not mean that she is very lonely and has no one to talk to. My mother is often in the kitchen and they have lots to talk about. My little boy also likes to go to the kitchen to talk to her. But when I return home from work, my maid understands that I need to spend quality time with my kids and does not need her to be around.
So having a maid does not mean that you have to sacrifice your privacy.
Your should never touch your maid, and never scream at her
If the maid's performance is not up to your standard, tell her in a cool calm manner. If she still does not change after a 2 to 3 months, or until you cannot tolerate her anymore, just send her back and get a new maid.
I think maids are very smart now. They may purposely behave in a certain way so as to provoke the employer, until the employer cannot take it any more and hit the maid out of anger. Then the maid can claim that the employer abuse her. There are quite a few cases like these recently in the news, where the employers get into trouble.
So be careful, don't fall into the maid's trap. Not happy, just quietly send her away.
What happens if...
1. Your maid steals.If you are very sure she has stolen your valuables, you should just send her back to her own country. Don't bother making a police report. It is not worth the trouble.
2. Your maid eats too much.Unless you are very generous, it is always better to separate your maid's food from the rest of the family. If your maid eats with the rest of the family, don't tell her to take whatever she wants. Always take out a reasonable amount of food for her.
3. Your maid is very lazy.Write out a detailed time table, tell her what she is expected to do at what time, and how much time she should take. Give her some time to improve. If she still does not improve, then you should send her away and find a new maid.
4. Your maid runs away.Don't panic first. Most likely she will return to her maid agency, or the police will find her within a couple of days. If she still has not finished paying for her loan, the agency will transfer her to a new employer, so you don't have to pay anything, but of course the new employer suffers.
It is still best to buy the bond protector/waiver. If your maid cannot be found, then you will pay $250, instead of the $5000 security bond. You will be given one month grace period to find your maid. Click Missing FDW to read more from MOM.
5. Your maid gets pregnant.You can send her back to her own country once you found out about it. Don't need to lose the $5000 security bond.
6. You want your maid to work in 2 households or moreUnder the existing Work Permit conditions, Foreign Domestic Workers (FDWs) are employed to perform domestic chores only for their employers at the residential addresses stated on the FDWs' Work Permit cards.
Click here for more information about the penalty.
Illegal Employment/Deployment
I believe all maids have been told that they should not work in 2 households. There are some maids who may agree to do so, but note that this is against MOM rule.
Check out the Foreign Domestic Worker Employer's Guidebook
Read page 10:
An exception may be made for FDWs who accompany their employer's children to a caregiver's home to care for the children under the caregiver's supervision. In this case, the FDW must agree to the arrangement and should not be asked to do the full load of housework in both homes.
7. If you change maid more than 4 times in a yearMOM does not have a rule that says you cannot change more than 4 times a year. MOM only makes it more difficult for the work permit to be approved.
Checkout this webpage from MOM.
Employers Who Change More Than Four Foreign Domestic Workers in a Year
Employers who apply for their fifth Foreign Domestic Workers (FDWs) within a 12 month period must attend the Classroom FDW Employers' Orientation Programme (EOP). Failure to comply with this requirement will result in the rejection of their Work Permit (WP) application.
Employers who apply for their sixth FDW or more within a 12 month period must attend an interview with an MOM officer before the Ministry will process the WP application. The purpose of the interview is to enable us to gain an understanding of the employer's practices for assessment of the WP Application.
8. If your maid keeps making mistakes
Some employers penalise their maids by making them pay a fine. But I would advise employers never to punish their maids. Read the following news article.
If the maid always make the same mistakes, no matter how many times you correct her, then you should just send her away. Otherwise you risk losing control of your temper and doing something nasty to her. Then you may end up in jail.
Remember that maids are human. A maid can hate you when she dislike your punishment. The fact in Singapore is that other people are much more likely to believe that the employer abuse the maid. So it is very easy for the maid to accuse the employer.
I don't even scold my maid. I will correct her mistake immediately in a cool, calm manner. If she makes the same mistake again, I will remind her that this is her 3rd/4th/5th time of making the same mistake. Then if she still does not change, and I cannot accept that, I will start to look for a new maid.
I would advise employers to use a reward system instead. If my maid performs well, then I will give her more hongbao money during Chinese New Year, Hari Raya or her birthday. This has worked very well with my maids. My current maid is very honest, she readily admitted when she broke something. I don't make a big fuss out of it so long as she does not do it very often.
Couple get jail for abusing maid
By Selina Lum (Source: Straits Times Jun 4 2008)A COUPLE ran a tight ship at home with their Indonesian maid. For every mistake she made at work, she had to pay a 'fine' of $10.
The couple - an aircraft engineer and a former Singapore Airlines (SIA) stewardess - then claimed the maid reported them for abusing her to get out of paying the penalties she accumulated.
Lim Yi Khung, 42, and his wife Aileen Khaw Lay Hoon, 31, denied the charges of hurting the maid and claimed trial.
A district court found them guilty after a seven-day trial and sentenced them yesterday to jail.
Lim, who works for SIA, was jailed for four weeks while Khaw, a housewife, will have to serve a six-week term.
They are both appealing the conviction and are out on $10,000 bail each.
Ms Ida Lestari Ningsih, 25, ran away from her employer's home in a Changi condominium on Feb 27 last year with bruises on her forehead.
She sought help from the condominium manager, who called the police.
Lim had kicked her on both sides of her hip.
His Malaysian wife had squeezed her breast, hit her eye, grabbed her hair and banged her head on the floor.
Ms Ida started working for the family in March 2006 when Khaw was expecting her third child.
In court, she testified that Lim kicked her after she had placed a pail, used to wash rags, in the kitchen sink, which was forbidden in the household.
She added that Khaw grabbed her breast after scolding her for scratching her head while refilling an electric flask. Khaw also punched her in the right eye after complaining that she was falling asleep.
Khaw's final act of abuse, grabbing the maid's hair and banging her head on the floor, came after the housewife scolded her for wringing a wet handkerchief with one hand.
That was when Ms Ida decided to run away, jumping out of the window of the first-floor apartment.
Both husband and wife fought her accusations, insisting the assaults had never taken place.
During the trial, the defence sought to portray Ms Ida as a scheming woman who made up the accounts of abuse, so she could run away and avoid paying the $10 penalties they imposed for each mistake she made.
The couple said the penalty scheme had been suggested by Ms Ida.
But Deputy Public Prosecutor Ng Der Lim argued that this defied logic as $10 was a lot of money for a maid to pay.
The prosecutor said this fine was put in place by the couple, adding that this was another example of how they were 'fussy and unreasonably demanding'.
The couple have three children, who were aged betwen eight months and five years at the time of the offences.
Yesterday, Khaw sobbed as their lawyer Adrian Wee pleaded for the couple to be fined instead. Mr Wee said that with the conviction, there was a high chance Lim would lose his airport security pass, which would also mean losing his job.
The lawyer argued the injuries were minor and there was no evidence of a 'continuous programme of abuse'.
District Judge Hamidah Ibrahim agreed the injuries were minor, but she said there was nothing exceptional in this case to depart from the stern view the courts take of maid-abuse offenders.
9. If your maid said that she saw ghosts in your house
It could be that your maid does not like to work for you, she is finding excuses so that you will send her back to the agency. Or your maid could be having mental illness. Any way, you should send this maid away as soon as possible.
10. Your maid tells you "If you are not happy with me, send me away"
If you said the same thing to your boss, what will happen ? You should start looking for a new maid. There are many many maids out there looking for jobs, there is no need to tolerate this one.
In my case, I opened a bank account for my maid. It is her personal account, and I let her keep her bank book. She does not want to have ATM card. Every month I will use internet to transfer her salary into her bank account. On her off day, she goes and update her bank book.
I have heard an employer worrying that the maid will withdraw money from her bank account and run away. So the employer thinks that she should open a joint account with the maid. But the truth is that, if the maid wants to run away, she will do so even if she doesn't have a single cent in her pocket.
Sending money back to her own country
I used Western Union. It is very easy. The maid gives me the name of the person who will receive the money in her country. I bring this name to the Post Office Western Union counter. Each transaction fee is $12. I will be issued a number. I just pass this number to the maid who then informs her family member to bring this number to collect the money immediately.
Telephone Calls / Letters
If your maid is taking care of your baby or toddler, you should not allow her to use her mobile phone when she is working. Maids love to talk with their friends, and they can chat on the phone all day long if you give them the freedom. It is very annoying, and very disturbing if she is taking care of your baby, she will not be able to concentrate on her work.
My maid is strictly not allowed to use her mobile phone when she is working during the day.
I advise employers to remove IDD from their home telephone. Your maid may talk for hours to her family in her home country without you knowing, especially if you leave your maid alone at home.
You should use www.skype.com. It is very very cheap compared to IDD. It allows you to talk to someone, for example, in USA, from your PC to his PC, completely free of charge. You can also call someone's on his telephone(mobile or fixed line) overseas at extremely cheap rates.
I allow my maid to send as many letters as she likes to her family. I don't believe in cutting off her communication completely. She is allowed to call her family using her own mobile phone as often as she likes, so long as she has completed all her task, and she must ask my permission.
Where should you maid sleep ?
The following is written on MOM website :
Employer Guidelines
Accommodation
"Where possible, your FDW should be given a separate room of her own. In the event that is not possible, you should ensure that sufficient space for sleep is provided. You are also expected to provide her with basic needs (e.g. food, a bed with mattress, a blanket, towels and toiletries, a fan if the sleeping area has poor ventilation etc).
Some examples of improper accommodation include making your FDW sleep in places where there is little privacy, such as on makeshift beds along the corridor or in the living room, or sharing a room with a male adult."
Note that there is no rule stated by MOM that you must give your maid a separate room. It is very common for maids to sleep with the children, or in the bomb shelter. Just make sure that the room is well ventilated and is quiet enough for her to get a good rest at night.
Will I lose my privacy with the maid around ?
My house rules disallow my maid to open any of our cupboards or touch anything on our shelves without my permission. My maid is also not allowed to enter any bedrooms without permission. When she has nothing to do, she stays in the kitchen, or inside her own room(she sleeps in the bomb shelter). She does not appear unless I call her. This does not mean that she is very lonely and has no one to talk to. My mother is often in the kitchen and they have lots to talk about. My little boy also likes to go to the kitchen to talk to her. But when I return home from work, my maid understands that I need to spend quality time with my kids and does not need her to be around.
So having a maid does not mean that you have to sacrifice your privacy.
Your should never touch your maid, and never scream at her
If the maid's performance is not up to your standard, tell her in a cool calm manner. If she still does not change after a 2 to 3 months, or until you cannot tolerate her anymore, just send her back and get a new maid.
I think maids are very smart now. They may purposely behave in a certain way so as to provoke the employer, until the employer cannot take it any more and hit the maid out of anger. Then the maid can claim that the employer abuse her. There are quite a few cases like these recently in the news, where the employers get into trouble.
So be careful, don't fall into the maid's trap. Not happy, just quietly send her away.
What happens if...
1. Your maid steals.If you are very sure she has stolen your valuables, you should just send her back to her own country. Don't bother making a police report. It is not worth the trouble.
2. Your maid eats too much.Unless you are very generous, it is always better to separate your maid's food from the rest of the family. If your maid eats with the rest of the family, don't tell her to take whatever she wants. Always take out a reasonable amount of food for her.
3. Your maid is very lazy.Write out a detailed time table, tell her what she is expected to do at what time, and how much time she should take. Give her some time to improve. If she still does not improve, then you should send her away and find a new maid.
4. Your maid runs away.Don't panic first. Most likely she will return to her maid agency, or the police will find her within a couple of days. If she still has not finished paying for her loan, the agency will transfer her to a new employer, so you don't have to pay anything, but of course the new employer suffers.
It is still best to buy the bond protector/waiver. If your maid cannot be found, then you will pay $250, instead of the $5000 security bond. You will be given one month grace period to find your maid. Click Missing FDW to read more from MOM.
5. Your maid gets pregnant.You can send her back to her own country once you found out about it. Don't need to lose the $5000 security bond.
6. You want your maid to work in 2 households or moreUnder the existing Work Permit conditions, Foreign Domestic Workers (FDWs) are employed to perform domestic chores only for their employers at the residential addresses stated on the FDWs' Work Permit cards.
Click here for more information about the penalty.
Illegal Employment/Deployment
I believe all maids have been told that they should not work in 2 households. There are some maids who may agree to do so, but note that this is against MOM rule.
Check out the Foreign Domestic Worker Employer's Guidebook
Read page 10:
An exception may be made for FDWs who accompany their employer's children to a caregiver's home to care for the children under the caregiver's supervision. In this case, the FDW must agree to the arrangement and should not be asked to do the full load of housework in both homes.
7. If you change maid more than 4 times in a yearMOM does not have a rule that says you cannot change more than 4 times a year. MOM only makes it more difficult for the work permit to be approved.
Checkout this webpage from MOM.
Employers Who Change More Than Four Foreign Domestic Workers in a Year
Employers who apply for their fifth Foreign Domestic Workers (FDWs) within a 12 month period must attend the Classroom FDW Employers' Orientation Programme (EOP). Failure to comply with this requirement will result in the rejection of their Work Permit (WP) application.
Employers who apply for their sixth FDW or more within a 12 month period must attend an interview with an MOM officer before the Ministry will process the WP application. The purpose of the interview is to enable us to gain an understanding of the employer's practices for assessment of the WP Application.
8. If your maid keeps making mistakes
Some employers penalise their maids by making them pay a fine. But I would advise employers never to punish their maids. Read the following news article.
If the maid always make the same mistakes, no matter how many times you correct her, then you should just send her away. Otherwise you risk losing control of your temper and doing something nasty to her. Then you may end up in jail.
Remember that maids are human. A maid can hate you when she dislike your punishment. The fact in Singapore is that other people are much more likely to believe that the employer abuse the maid. So it is very easy for the maid to accuse the employer.
I don't even scold my maid. I will correct her mistake immediately in a cool, calm manner. If she makes the same mistake again, I will remind her that this is her 3rd/4th/5th time of making the same mistake. Then if she still does not change, and I cannot accept that, I will start to look for a new maid.
I would advise employers to use a reward system instead. If my maid performs well, then I will give her more hongbao money during Chinese New Year, Hari Raya or her birthday. This has worked very well with my maids. My current maid is very honest, she readily admitted when she broke something. I don't make a big fuss out of it so long as she does not do it very often.
Couple get jail for abusing maid
By Selina Lum (Source: Straits Times Jun 4 2008)A COUPLE ran a tight ship at home with their Indonesian maid. For every mistake she made at work, she had to pay a 'fine' of $10.
The couple - an aircraft engineer and a former Singapore Airlines (SIA) stewardess - then claimed the maid reported them for abusing her to get out of paying the penalties she accumulated.
Lim Yi Khung, 42, and his wife Aileen Khaw Lay Hoon, 31, denied the charges of hurting the maid and claimed trial.
A district court found them guilty after a seven-day trial and sentenced them yesterday to jail.
Lim, who works for SIA, was jailed for four weeks while Khaw, a housewife, will have to serve a six-week term.
They are both appealing the conviction and are out on $10,000 bail each.
Ms Ida Lestari Ningsih, 25, ran away from her employer's home in a Changi condominium on Feb 27 last year with bruises on her forehead.
She sought help from the condominium manager, who called the police.
Lim had kicked her on both sides of her hip.
His Malaysian wife had squeezed her breast, hit her eye, grabbed her hair and banged her head on the floor.
Ms Ida started working for the family in March 2006 when Khaw was expecting her third child.
In court, she testified that Lim kicked her after she had placed a pail, used to wash rags, in the kitchen sink, which was forbidden in the household.
She added that Khaw grabbed her breast after scolding her for scratching her head while refilling an electric flask. Khaw also punched her in the right eye after complaining that she was falling asleep.
Khaw's final act of abuse, grabbing the maid's hair and banging her head on the floor, came after the housewife scolded her for wringing a wet handkerchief with one hand.
That was when Ms Ida decided to run away, jumping out of the window of the first-floor apartment.
Both husband and wife fought her accusations, insisting the assaults had never taken place.
During the trial, the defence sought to portray Ms Ida as a scheming woman who made up the accounts of abuse, so she could run away and avoid paying the $10 penalties they imposed for each mistake she made.
The couple said the penalty scheme had been suggested by Ms Ida.
But Deputy Public Prosecutor Ng Der Lim argued that this defied logic as $10 was a lot of money for a maid to pay.
The prosecutor said this fine was put in place by the couple, adding that this was another example of how they were 'fussy and unreasonably demanding'.
The couple have three children, who were aged betwen eight months and five years at the time of the offences.
Yesterday, Khaw sobbed as their lawyer Adrian Wee pleaded for the couple to be fined instead. Mr Wee said that with the conviction, there was a high chance Lim would lose his airport security pass, which would also mean losing his job.
The lawyer argued the injuries were minor and there was no evidence of a 'continuous programme of abuse'.
District Judge Hamidah Ibrahim agreed the injuries were minor, but she said there was nothing exceptional in this case to depart from the stern view the courts take of maid-abuse offenders.
9. If your maid said that she saw ghosts in your house
It could be that your maid does not like to work for you, she is finding excuses so that you will send her back to the agency. Or your maid could be having mental illness. Any way, you should send this maid away as soon as possible.
10. Your maid tells you "If you are not happy with me, send me away"
If you said the same thing to your boss, what will happen ? You should start looking for a new maid. There are many many maids out there looking for jobs, there is no need to tolerate this one.
281 comments:
1 – 200 of 281 Newer› Newest»Hi,
want to ask you on your point ;
You cannot use the washing machine or dryer. You must hand wash your own clothes and bedsheets.
I know some families state this rule as well and want to find out why, coz I may need to engage a maid in future. Your blog is really useful for me
It's a personal preference. I do not like anyone outside my family to use my washing machine. Mainly because I am quite superstitious. I am afraid that the maid will throw her clothes with all sorts of undesirable stains inside the washing machine which may cause bad luck.
I don't even put floor towels/kitchen towels inside the washing machine. These must be handwashed.
If you are OK with the maid using washing machine for her clothes, by all means let her do so.
Hi I can't seem to download the appraisal from singaporemotherhood. Is there any way i got get my hands on it?
Just click on the FDW appraisal form in singaporemotherhood. Then click Save. You need to rename the file to FDW.xls. You will need to have Microsoft Excel to open it.
I may convert it to a webpage later when I have the time.
why not report to the police if the maid steals. I thought with this in record, the maid will not be able to come to Singapore again. Isn't this a good method to bar all those dishonest maids from coming to Singapore
The employer usually has to pay the $2000 maid loan for a new maid. The maid has to work for at least 8 months to repay this loan. If she works only for 1 month, and you caught her stealing and you report her to the police, you will never get back the rest of your maid loan. In this case, you have no choice but to send her back to the maid agency to be transferred to a new employer. I know it is sickening, but blame it on the maid agency and the maid.
Even if she does not have maid loan, it is too much trouble to go through all the police investigations, etc. It is simply not worth it. The worst is if she starts accusing you of abusing her etc, then it will even be more troublesome.
Hmn i also doesnt like the idea of another person outside family using washing machine. but if no one at home, she uses it also nobody knows right? i dont even wash panties etc in washer so if maid put hers in together with other clothings and wash also nobody knows right? but if hear washer move, ahhhhhh someone is using washer.
wowwwwww the story abt abusing n stealing is really....... ai.... someone stole things n yet cannot hand over to police. WHY?!?! Then if she lied n said kena abuse, employee kena....... OMG. Why only maids must or will kena abuse le?
and to add with, now no maid at home and yes, i also do not wash floor towel etc , kitchen towels inside washer. husband wash floor towel hehehhehehehe
a very good blog.
Thanks very much. My ex-maid is going to retired and I need to find a new one. Your friend's daily schedule is also very helpful.
I have borrowed 4 books in library. not so helpful. why don't you publish all this info.?
Regarding giving maid day off
My frens have been telling me I am too lax with my maid. She asked for short time off to buy her 'stuff' like every alternate day. She asked me for the 3rd time to buy and keep a mobile phone when I had to repeatedly reject her request. My maid is a mature philippino woman in her 40s and had working experience. In front of me, she seemed to care very much for my baby so I figured I cannot be too strict with her.
For her day off, do we tell them which day off, what time they are expected to be home for their day off etc?
Yes you should definitely tell them which day off. You can also tell them what time they can leave the house, and what time they must return.
I told my maids that they cannot take day off on public holidays, except Hari Raya Puasa, because I also need to rest !
Regarding publishing this blog, thanks very much for your compliments :) I am happy enough to have more people visiting my blog :)
Hi,
Your blog is very useful and I really need more advise from you. My maid is experienced 5 years in Taiwan... she just joined me a month ago and everything she keeps comparing to Taiwan (where she worked for big family but have a lot of freedom to do what she wants eg. no fixed schedule of housework or cooking time etc)
i wanted to print out the "agreement" like "cannot use the phone without permission" etc but is it really ok to get her to sign? actually what is the purpose of that?
i do not know how to manage my relationship with her coz by nature, i am quite a soft person. and she told me her prev employers all like "friend-friend" basis with her. sometimes i am even scared to offend her if i instruct her to do things. but i feel that she is becoming more daring... like dont think of herself as a maid but more like my FRIEND. :(
i hope not to change maid coz actually she do hsework is ok.. but just that eg. u tell her to wipe table first then mop floor she will say dont want. she want to mop the floor first.
and can i check with you, is it ok to buy a packet of coffee (those 3-in-1) for the maid which the brand is different from what we take? coz i prefer a brand which is not so sweet but it costs more. and my maid drinks one cup a day.. so im thinking of buying her a cheaper brand but i scared she will compare and ask why we differentiate her coffee from ours.
Derene,
You just have to remember that you are the employer and she is the maid. Otherwise she will climb over your head and become very difficult to control. The next time she tell you her ex-employer blah blah blah, just simply tell her in a cool calm manner, that she is working for you now, and she has to follow your rules. Tell her not to mention her ex-employer again.
The purpose of the agreement is simply to make it clear to your maid what are the house rules. Many maids will forget what you tell them verbally. But if you have it written down, and ask them to sign it, then they will be more likely to remember the rules and follow them.
Actually you should have given the agreement to your maid on the very first day that she arrives. I think now she already knows that you are scared of her, so the agreement will not work already.
Everything my maid eats is different from us. I advise all employers to separate the maid's food/toiletries right from the beginning. I drink UCC and illy coffee which can cost up to $20 a packet, don't expect me to share with the maid !
Hi Tamarind,
Thanks for your reply. Now that I did not set those "rules" upfront, what can i do to remedy the situation?
Hi Tamarind,
My husband has been relocated to work in Malaysia and we have the intention of moving to Malaysia to join him. At the same time, we would like our maid to join us too. Is this arrangement possible? If yes, what are the preparation we need to do?
Thank you.
derene,
You must first learn to be strict. Make sure she does things your way, tell her no other way is possible.
You can try to introduce your rules, one day at a time. Tell her you wanted her to settle down first before teaching her the rules. If she says her ex-employer does not do that, just tell her you are her employer now, and you don't want to know about her ex-employer.
If she still insists on doing things her way, then you really need to consider whether she is worth keeping. You are paying her your hard earned money, you should get someone who do things your way.
irene,
I don't have experience transferring maid to Malaysia, so I cannot advise you. I think you need to check with the maid agencies in Malaysia.
May I check with you anyone has a maid schedule for similiar screnario. I have 3 children (6, 4 and 2 yr old). She is only 3 days old. thanks in advance
Hi tamarind,
I am planning to get a new maid to take care my 8mos gal and without adult's supervision.
My question is as hubby is johorean and we will normally go back JB fortnightly. Is it possible to bring the maid to JB fortnightly? And can I ask her to do cleaning at my MIL house too? tks!
kacingkia,
This is stated in MOM rules.
An exception may be made for FDWs who accompany their employer's children to a caregiver's home to care for the children under the caregiver's supervision. In this case, the FDW must agree to the arrangement and should not be asked to do the full load of housework in both homes.
I am not sure about bringing maids to JB fornightly since I have not done that before.
Hi, thanks for the great article.
I have a maid for almost a year.
My hubby and me never cook for breakfast so it is easier for us to eat bread. We use to give the maid slice bread for breakfast too. We also gave packets of instant noodle that she can cook anytime.
After about a month she said the bread is not good enough (we buy the inexpensive one from Giant).
Sometimes we also have some leftover food from the night before. We eat the food for breakfast/lunch the next day, and we also give the maid the same leftover food. She sometimes refuse to eat the food, so sometimes she started to buy for herself.
Now she's complaining that we never give her enough food etc.
What should we do? We give her food but if she wants to have the best food then of course we cannot give her.
How many slices of bread do you give your maid ? I would allow my maid to take up to 4 - 5 slices of bread (the cheapest ones), with butter/peanut butter/jam etc. Actually all my maids take no more than 2 slices of bread. They never complain that it is not enough.
I would advise you to separate your maid's food. For example, buy her a loaf of bread and tell her it is only for her, don't restrict how much bread she takes at first. Of course you need to have your limits, tell her if you thinks that she eats too much. I think 1 loaf of bread should last about 3 - 4 days for 1 person.
Or you can ask her what she likes for breakfast. Some maids may prefer to eat rice. You can ask her to cook for herself.
I would advise employers to separate the maid's food. My maid does not take leftover food. I bought her enough frozen chicken drumsticks/wings, fish(cheap ones like selar/tengiri), and some vegetables every week, about $20 a week. She will cook for herself. For rice, I never restrict my maid.
Thanks for replying.
We give her one loaf a week (big loaf). It's not the quantity, because she gets more than enuf. She only wants more exp food.
What to do when she is demanding like this?
So long as you are giving her a reasonable amount of food, you should just ignore whatever she demands.
My maid has been with us for nearly 3 years. We have a decent working relationship. We're not close but we respect each other and our roles within the household. We have all made mistakes.
Our maid is planning a permanent return to the Philippines in October to get married. We've noticed that she has mentally started to 'check-out' of the relationship. Her performance has been on a slow decline. She's also been less cheerful and rather moody. We feel this shift in performance and attitude is akin to any employee starting to wind down in their job. It doesn't mean that employees are allowed to slack off, but the fact is that it's just human nature – she resigned. Although we have mentioned our concerns to her a few times, improvement is only temporary. She’s not a disaster -- it’s more that we’re trying to manage an employee who is simply ‘moving on’. Personally, I have let a lot slide because it's too much work to nag about small issues, which only just really annoy me. I know she’s excited to go home and start her life. How hard to you work when you know you’re leaving your employer? She's got a great relationship with our kids and for that, I am most thankful.
Over the last few months since she informed us about her plans to return home, she has been busy collecting many household items, toys and clothes to pack in her box. She has shipped several boxes back to the Philippines over the years and has recently been working to fill her last few boxes. We've been excited for her and we know she doesn’t have a lot to start her life. I have given her many of my own household items. I have given her things that I would otherwise keep, sell or donate. If I don’t use it, I give it to her. If the kids outgrow it, she can have it. If it’s broken, she can have it. I have even given her my own wedding dress, which I have had altered for her. I have truly been generous.
So that's the background. I have a problem and I am unsure how to handle it.
We give our maid money to purchase groceries for the family twice weekly – $150 on Tuesdays and $150 on Fridays. From this, she has always been allowed to purchase her own food and basic toiletries. I started noticing that her usual items such as coffee, noodles, napkins, shampoo, sanitary napkins are on the receipts but not in their normal locations like the cupboard or bathroom. The problem is that she has been skimming $15-20 off the top of our grocery money to stock up on her favorite items and pre-pack into her box.
I'm not the sort of person to rummage through her personal belongings, but I have been suspecting that the money vs consumption of items didn't 'feel right' for some time now. I started to scrutinize (guiltily) the receipts for the last few months and noticed that it's been getting more aggressive. I have always asked for receipts for everything from groceries, top-up cards for the bus, taxi chits and so on. At first I couldn't account for $2 to 5 dollars over the months. I figured she was skimming but I'm a reasonable person-- perhaps she wanted a drink or a snack? So moving on...it's been increasing little by little over time. I recently couldn't account for nearly $25 of items listed as purchased on the bill but not found in their usual locations around the house. So where is all this stuff when she just went shopping?
I'm not the sort of person to rummage through personal belongings but I went straight to explore her box and sure enough -- coffee, noodles, table napkins...you get the point. It was like finding a squirrel stashing away nuts for the winter.
I can't bring myself to investigate her entire box. There is a part of me that doesn't want to know. Of course, I question whether any of our personal belongings are destined to the Philippines? I know I have a right to look. But is it worth it? She is with us for 3 more months. She is great with our kids and this is my priority. I would like to put a stop to this but I don't want to suffer the consequences of a full-blown meltdown and/or emergency trip to the airport to send her back. I would rather lose 20 bucks to save $1000 but it's still not right. Period.
We were, I say were, planning to surprise her with $1000 as a thank-you and wedding present but she's unknowingly just lost her entire bonus. I feel bad for her really.
Does anyone have a practical view on how to handle this? I’m not however, looking for a 'pack her bags on Sunday and escort her to the airport' solution.
Thanks for reading...
Thanks for sharing with us.
I used to let my ex-maid go to the supermarket to buy her own groceries etc. In the end, I found out that she was cooking extra food for her boyfriend(who lived in the neighbourhood). She was feeding her boyfriend using my money !
I sent that maid back already. Even though my current maid is very good, I never trust her to buy groceries for us. I would rather go to the supermarket myself.
If you think that this maid is still worth keeping, you should have a talk with your maid, in a cool, calm manner, that you know what she is doing. Tell her you are giving her a chance to change.
Then I think you should just stop letting your maid buy the groceries for you. Just tell her you like to go to supermarket now. If your maid is not a bad person, she should learn her lesson.
A very helpful blog. Was wondering if you could advise me (i'm sure there's an answer somewhere in your blog but i haven't had time to read through it all)
We got our maid last Jul, primary purpose was to care after our 1m old baby. We never leave her alone with the baby, there's always either myself or my mom-in-law/sis-in-law with them to supervise. If i'm off-shift and tired, she looks after baby, otherwise i look after him and she does normal housework (sweeping, washing clothes). She does not cook, we don't make her buy groceries and since she opted for no off days, she has never left the house alone..there's never been any reason for her to. She eats the same food we do and usually even more than my husband (our mistake, will need to apportion food for the next maid).
Recently I've noticed that some of my boy's clothes have been stored away in the 'too small to wear' box without him ever using them. To this, she replied that i told her to keep it away and that i forgot. With her latest announcement (will elaborate below), we suspect that she's hoping for our hand-me-downs and that's probably why she kept some of his unused clothes hidden.
Also since i'm a FTWM, she tags with my son to my mil's home when i'm at work. There she does mostly nothing. My MIL will cook, wash etc. When we talk to maid about it and ask if she forget to help MIL, she actually replied that she didn't forget, she know how to do the chores but just didn't. Its not considered working in 2 houses becos the whole day she is at MIL's place doing nothing and then i fetch her back to my place for the night and there's no chores.
I'm expecting my 2nd child now and my maid suddenly said that her husband back home can't cope with her 3yo daughter and she need to return asap. She's only been with us for a year so we've decided that we won't be helping to pay for her airfare back. Is this fair? We would still need to fork out agent fees for the next maid anyway.. please advise.
Also, when she leaves, is it ok for me to go through her belongings? After the hidden baby clothes episode, i find it hard to trust her.
Re last comment posted by anonymous, im in almost the same situation as you!
Im pregnant with my 3rd one, and delivering in Sep. Thinking that we (my mum esp, since im working mum) might not be able to cope,i just hired an Indonesia maid. She has been with us close to a month.
Maid is 24 yrs old, and considered inexperienced worker, although she said she worked as domestic helper in Indon for 2 years. But from the way she works in our house, she doesn't seem to know much except taking a cloth to wipe around. Even close to a month, she still hasn't got her washing (clothes) right! She will mix bedsheet with socks, dark and light coloured clothings... or all together in one wash. Can;t wash milk bottle cleanly too. Now i even hv to help her to sort the clothes to be washed. She only capable of PLAYING (literally laughing and crazy) with the boys.;p
On weekdays, she also need to go over to my mum's place, since my mum is still the main caregiver for my 2 young boys. She is not required to cook, since my mum will cook the meals. She doesn't offer help at my mum's place, except washing up the dishes after eating. Other than that, she just sit around, or nap when my kids are sleeping. Also can eat alot. In fact, my mum even have to "serve" her, since mum has to provide lunch and dinner! Mum also end up feeding and bathing the kids - feed slowly, dint test bath water etc. Overall, just more of a burden than help. She also claimed that she cannot cook (even frying egg and cook instant noodle). So my mum cooked that for her. But we found out that she can fry egg!!
Recently,our fresh milk/ drinks in the fridge get diluted often. We suspected that maid tampered with the drinks, since there aren't anybody else at home. We dint really confront her yet. We set up tests, and really, those drinks really became diluted after 1-2 days.
Initially, i was thinking that i can tolerate her if she cannot do her housework well. But, i just feel disgusted at the thought that she wld tamper with the drinks in the house! What if any of us fall ill? It's not as if we don't allow her to drink them. That's an integrity issue! She even tried to leave the house by herself (in her 2nd week with us) without permission, but was spotted at the door by my mum.
Im more of less decided to send her back to agency, since she violated our houserules times (apologising times to us doesn't help). But is One month too short/ cruel for her? But i seriously don't think she can help much if my 3rd one arrive, when she can't even do simple things well with mum's help at the moment. Now my whole family had probia getting another maid, cos the 2nd one may turn out same type, or another set of challenging problems.
Quote:
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I'm expecting my 2nd child now and my maid suddenly said that her husband back home can't cope with her 3yo daughter and she need to return asap. She's only been with us for a year so we've decided that we won't be helping to pay for her airfare back. Is this fair? We would still need to fork out agent fees for the next maid anyway.. please advise.
Also, when she leaves, is it ok for me to go through her belongings? After the hidden baby clothes episode, i find it hard to trust her.
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Your maid asks to leave because she knows that when your second baby arrives, her work will be very tough. Most maids nowadays are very smart, they know how to change employer until they get an easy job.
According to the new MOM regulation, you cannot ask the maid to pay for her air ticket. You may be fined up to $5000.
http://singaporemaid.blogspot.com/2008/07/latest-news-9-july-2008.html
Many employers do go through the maid's belongings when she goes home.
Quote:
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Recently,our fresh milk/ drinks in the fridge get diluted often. We suspected that maid tampered with the drinks, since there aren't anybody else at home. We dint really confront her yet. We set up tests, and really, those drinks really became diluted after 1-2 days.
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I think this is very serious. If you are very sure your maid is the one who diluted the drinks, you should send her back immediately.
One month is not short at all. I would send her back within 3 days.
Since employers have to pay for the air ticket, you will have no choice but to send her back to the agency for transfer to a new employer. It is not a nice thing to pass a bad maid around, but there is nothing much you can do, unless you are willing to pay the air ticket.
My maid is always pinching on my food. It is not as if we are not providing her enough to eat. Our style is: We eat @ hawker centre, she eats with us; we eat @ Restaurant, she eats with us; we eat ice cream, she eats ice cream; we eat Cheng Teng, she eats Cheng Teng. Yes I admit that not every time we will give her whatever the family is eating (probably 10% of the time we don’t give her) and that is because we do not want her to take it for granted that it is natural that she gets to enjoy what we are having. She has learnt to be appreciative. Usually when I buy bubble tea to share with hubby, I will buy 1 for her. Nowadays she don’t look appreciative leh. Wah.. she gets 1 whole cup while I share with hubby leh…
Not that I’m calculative, but she finished 1kg of sugar in a week, 1 bottle of olive oil in a month, 1 bottle of soy sauce in a month. Spending so much money on these groceries is one thing but her eating habits will pile up my bills if she falls sick while working for me. I explained about the health concern nicely and she can still cheerfully tell me about how her friends are either ‘die from heart attack @ 25 yrs old’ or ‘had 1 leg chop off due becoz he is diabetic’
A few times, asked her to cut apples for us and one for herself too. Realized that she gave us the smaller apples while she had the bigger one. Quite frustrating. She was caught munching on my Longans when I asked her to peel off the skin for us. To me, taking without asking is stealing ma.
How can I stop her from eating my expensive food that I buy for my family and ensure that she does not consume it secretly?
Hi Tamarind,
thanks for your response. Wld like to add that my maid is still with me, though the thought of sending her away has always been on my mind. Mum thought can give her a second chance. The "mystery of the diluted milk" has not happened for the past 2 weeks -- cld be my dad has spoken to her on that too. Maid also has been apologising for mistakes done frequently - dunno good or bad thing in the long run.
Maid was recently selected to go MOM for interview. As agreed between my maid and myself, we would keep her salary ($10 a month) for her. But MOM officer advise that we should give her the money and for her to keep, and when she has $500, we should open bank account for her! MOM officer said it is an offence for us to retain her salary - which we don't,and we (maid and us) kept salary payment record among ourselves. looks like i shld start giving her the cash then?!
To "girl", my maid finished one bottle of Nutella chocolate spread in a week. She's at her 5th bottle now, considering she's only here for 6 weeks. Guess what, she had toothache recently. I hope she realised that it is not advisable to be gorging on chocolate like no tomorrow... for health sake. Unless you really do inventory count, may be hard to stop your maid from eating your food. Maybe upfront, you can tell her what are the things she can eat and what's not?
sunshine gal:
for us, we were advised by the agent to keep all the maid's salary, but keep a log book for her mthly salary & the amt she spent. this is to minimize chances of conflicts since she is not able to have any money on her. but then ours is a transfer maid lah. haha maybe that is y the previous employer sack her? i dunno le.
anyway, your maid very daring hor.. eat your nutella. we only buy jam & kaya for maid. i will state that certain things she can't eat lah, but nv know if she eats a not.
Hi,
we don't really separate most of our food from the maid. Unless we specifically said so that she cannot eat, by default maid can eat what we have in the hse. But i do buy her food (e.g. biscuits) that meant just for her, and we will not eat those. My boys love nutella on bread and we probably eat only once a week. Since boys love to eat, we thought it's ok that maid share that too. Just dint occur to me that she would deplete it so FAST.
Btw, think maid diluted the fresh milk again recently. Dunno if i shld confront her, cos im planning to change her. Im now waiting for suitable transfer maid.
I did open a bank account for my maid. Every month, I will ask her whether she want cash, or transfer to her bank account.
I think it is OK to give cash to a maid. But if it is a few hundred dollars or more, then it should be kept in the bank.
Most employers are afraid of the maid stealing their money, then claim that it belongs to her. In my case, I keep all my cash very securely, so there is no chance for the maid to steal. I feel that it is the responsibility of the employer to be careful.
Hi! Tarmarind;
Yr blog is indeed very useful. Learn alot from yr blog. *_* (especially the House rules) As I had a very painful experience with my first philippino maid; hired to take care of my 3 mths old son then.
Agreement set not to have mobile or rest day.(though intended to give her when she worked for a yr or so with good performance) who knows she asked for mobile & day off on her fourth day of work!! Of course, was rejected by me and thereafter she wanted to "go home" but the truth she wants to changed employer.
I sent her back to the agency and she was my first & the last miad till now.
But I think I would need to hire one probably when my son is older. Like what you ve mentioned you do not know how they ll treat yr child when you re not ard.
Is is true that Maids frm Mynammar is better than a philippino maid as they re not as "smart" as them?
Language is a big issue? Any good advice on type of maids will be "suitable" for my situation? (where no one at home with my son; need to take care and send my son to pre school etc)?
Hi Tamarind, thanks for the great blog for a novice like me! I hace to employ a maid cos my MIL cannot handle my one mth old baby & my 11mth old nephew.
When I told my MIL that we need to segragate the food, she says no need, the maid will just eat whatever we eat. (We don't really eat expensive stuffs.) And MIL claim that maid will not eat so much but after seeing so many scenarios I realised that they DO eat alot!
And also regarding separating toiletries, how do you ensure tat the maid don't use your expensive shampoo when its in the toilet?
And cos our smaller room is occupied by MIL, we have to give the bigger bedroom to the maid but it is not her bedroom cos the baby's clothes & stuffs are there & we are free to go in as & when. If it is the casde, how do we tell the maid that it is her room but not hers exactly? If we walk in & out of the room, are we invading her privacy? Or if she decided that that is her room & start to close the door, hwo do we manage that?
My maid has been with me for 1 yr, she is not fantastic,but i am ok with her; and appreciate that she can help with my gal's homework -- i am a working mother.
But, I do not understand why is it that she must make phone calls (local) secretly. When I confront about it, she flatly denied it. I have checked my facts before i confront her (as i do not want to wrongly accuse her). This happened a number of time. Each time, i let it go, as i think making phone call is not a BIG problem; but what irritate me is that she lied outrightly.
One day, i finally gather enuff anger to take leave from work and went back home to confront her. i made it clear that i am not against her making phonecalls, she just need to ask permission. BUT most of all, what i did not like is her lying.
This is not the only things she lied about. I have tried to close one eye; i have on many occassions nearly send her back, only to pull out at the last minute.
Tonite, someone saw her making phonecall downstairs using public phone. i do not know where she gets her money from as she is not sposed to be holding on to money.
i am still thinking if i should send her back.
Just like to gather some suggestions as to what to do... Do you allow your maid to use the phone?
I think for employers with babies or small children at home, it is best not to allow the maid to use HP during the day when they are working.
The maid can keep a HP, but she can only use it at night after she has completed all their work. If she is caught using the HP secretly during the day, then the HP will be confiscated and returned to her when she returns home.
Hi Tamarind, can reply my post? Thanks!
{Hi Tamarind, thanks for the great blog for a novice like me! I hace to employ a maid cos my MIL cannot handle my one mth old baby & my 11mth old nephew.
When I told my MIL that we need to segragate the food, she says no need, the maid will just eat whatever we eat. (We don't really eat expensive stuffs.) And MIL claim that maid will not eat so much but after seeing so many scenarios I realised that they DO eat alot!
And also regarding separating toiletries, how do you ensure tat the maid don't use your expensive shampoo when its in the toilet?
And cos our smaller room is occupied by MIL, we have to give the bigger bedroom to the maid but it is not her bedroom cos the baby's clothes & stuffs are there & we are free to go in as & when. If it is the casde, how do we tell the maid that it is her room but not hers exactly? If we walk in & out of the room, are we invading her privacy? Or if she decided that that is her room & start to close the door, hwo do we manage that?}
Hi ,
Want to ask for your advise..
My maid always rest / sleep afternoon nap at home (from 3plus to evening).. as my MIL told her that there is nothing for her to do so ask her to rest. As she is expected to look after my newborn in 1 and half months time, I am afraid that taking the afternoon nap will become a habit. and I can't really communicate with her as she is from Indo. Pls help..
Thanks
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Hi Tamarind, thanks for the great blog for a novice like me! I hace to employ a maid cos my MIL cannot handle my one mth old baby & my 11mth old nephew.
When I told my MIL that we need to segragate the food, she says no need, the maid will just eat whatever we eat. (We don't really eat expensive stuffs.) And MIL claim that maid will not eat so much but after seeing so many scenarios I realised that they DO eat alot!
And also regarding separating toiletries, how do you ensure tat the maid don't use your expensive shampoo when its in the toilet?
And cos our smaller room is occupied by MIL, we have to give the bigger bedroom to the maid but it is not her bedroom cos the baby's clothes & stuffs are there & we are free to go in as & when. If it is the casde, how do we tell the maid that it is her room but not hers exactly? If we walk in & out of the room, are we invading her privacy? Or if she decided that that is her room & start to close the door, hwo do we manage that?
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It is OK that your maid eat whatever you eat. You or your MIL can take out a reasonable portion of the food for her. Do not let her take as much as she wants.
All my expensive shampoo/body wash etc are in the master bathroom. My maid is strictly not allowed to enter my master bathroom without permission. She uses the toilet in the kitchen.
You can lock your shampoo in cabinet after use. But I would just tell the maid that she is not allowed to use it. A good maid should know respect my houserules. If the maid cannot be trusted to follow simple rules, then it is no point keeping her.
My maid's room is also partly used to store our toilet paper etc. We also enter her room when needed. You can just tell your maid your expectations clearly. Tell her she is not allowed to close the door during the day. There are many employers who do not allow the maid to close the door even at night when she sleeps. It is all up to you.
I do allow my maid to close the door when she sleeps, if we need anything, I will just call her loudly. But during the day, she understands clearly that we will go in to get things whenever necessary.
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Hi ,
Want to ask for your advise..
My maid always rest / sleep afternoon nap at home (from 3plus to evening).. as my MIL told her that there is nothing for her to do so ask her to rest. As she is expected to look after my newborn in 1 and half months time, I am afraid that taking the afternoon nap will become a habit. and I can't really communicate with her as she is from Indo. Pls help..
Thanks
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You can try writing down everything in English for your maid. Get a dictionary or ask your agency to help to translate.
I also do not think that it is good to allow a maid to nap. But if the maid has to take care of the newborn at night, then it is reasonable for her to take a rest in the afternoon.
You can write down a list of things for her to do from 3 to evening. For example, wipe off the dust on all table tops/cabinets/shelves, clean the window grills, etc. Tell her what to do at 3pm, 4pm, 5pm, etc. If really nothing to do, it is OK to ask her to repeat certain things.
Hi, Tamarind, your blog is very useful to a lot of employers out there. I didn't know I might actually have an issue with my maid until recently she went inside the bathroom and dyed her hair with some brown. I was surprised and not shocked cos I love hairlighting my hair. Now I did not confront her about that cos to me, it seems that she is also human, besides i saw that package is from watson's. Should I ask her? Do they have freedom to do anything like that? She also paints her nails. Well, my friends said maybe she has boyfriend outside, i dunno. Nowadays I stay home to do work, only time she is "missing" is early morning at 6am to "wash car" till about 6:40am. I can see from my apartment where she is downstairs. Sometimes she disappears for about 20 or so minutes b4 she cleans the car. Ok, background to this maid, she is from indonesia, I took over her contract from my mom as they have moved into smaller apartment and do not need a maid. I took over last nov when she was 1 year already in singapore. she is 25 years old. She seems quite nice etc, I did not have any complaints or so but my mom and sis kept saying she has changed recently, eg. did not iron my sis clothes properly, anyhow clean my mom's kitchen whenever we went over there to spend time with my kids. Then few months ago, I started seeing her painting her nails, buying more and more fashionable clothes like masak malam, under $12 etc but she does not wear them. all inside her big bag. But one thing i don't like is her keep wanting to pack all things in the house, my documents on the table, cupboards etc. She actually has nothing much to do except laundry, cleaning, ironing, cooking. So when she is free, she will keep ironing, everything including underwears... keep mopping the floor (sometimes 3 -4 times a day). But somehow lately I thought she might be stealing small things - like toys, fake bracelets (my mom bought from china, nail clippers, hair pins etc... I gave her permission to buy cellphone and her phone keeps ringing but she is smart and not answer when I am at home. Ok, now, her contract is up in dec. I wanted to renew it but dunno should I. I want to lay the houserules from I read here, but how to do it? can i still make her sign an agreement on houserules? Please advise. Thank you!
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Nowadays I stay home to do work, only time she is "missing" is early morning at 6am to "wash car" till about 6:40am. I can see from my apartment where she is downstairs. Sometimes she disappears for about 20 or so minutes b4 she cleans the car.
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I think her hair dye is a small issue compared to her disappearance every morning. We employers are responsible for the maid. If she gets pregnant, we have to send her back or risk losing the $5000 bond. It is not that we don't want to give the maid freedom, it is MOM which imposed the rules on us. If my maid disppear for 20 minutes everyday, I will not trust her. If I were you, I will not renew her work permit.
You can try to talk to her. But it is very difficult to change a person. Most likely she will promise not to do it again, and then try to find other ways to disappear without you knowing. This type of maid really cannot be trusted.
Back to the hair dye issue, it is up to you. As employers, I think we have the right to tell our maid whether we like her hair to be dyed or not. The maid has the right to say that she wants to dye her hair. But then we employers also have a right to change maid if we don't like the maid. So if the maid must dye her hair, and the employer does not like it, the maid can just find a new employer who can allow her to dye hair and paint her nails. This is nothing to do with human rights. It is only the job requirement. For example, I used to work for an American MNC, and they do not allow production operators to wear makeup when working.
Your maid has been given too much freedom. Even if you decide to renew her work permit, asking her sign the houserules is useless, she will probably not follow them.
Hi Tamarind,
My maid has been with me for more than 1 year. She together with my mother-in-law takes good care of my baby girl. So far I have nothing to complain!
I plans to go abroad with all my family during christmas holiday, what can I do with the maid? Is it safe to leave her alone at home? It will be 13 days. Actually i called my agency and was told that I have to pay $15 per day for the food and lodge if I choose to sent her to the agency, which I think is quite expensive. can I send her to my friend's house during my absence and what do you suggenst?
Tamarind,
Thanks for ur blog. I really feel very useful bcos i know nothing abt employing maid. ur blog give me a lot of guides.. Thanks..
I need more advise from u. I know a maid she want to transfer to work for me. Her current employer don't like her. and I'm going to take her. This should be consider transfer maid, right? Can i do the transferring myself without agent help?
if i were doing the transfer myself and not going thru the agent, is the current employer still able to get another maid from her agent?
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Hi Tamarind,
My maid has been with me for more than 1 year. She together with my mother-in-law takes good care of my baby girl. So far I have nothing to complain!
I plans to go abroad with all my family during Christmas holiday, what can I do with the maid? Is it safe to leave her alone at home? It will be 13 days. Actually i called my agency and was told that I have to pay $15 per day for the food and lodge if I choose to sent her to the agency, which I think is quite expensive. can I send her to my friend's house during my absence and what do you suggest?
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You can send her to your friend's house. But take note that she cannot do any housework for your friend. She can only do housework at the address stated on her work permit card.
I don't think it is worth sending her to the agency. She may get bad influence from other maids there.
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Tamarind,
Thanks for ur blog. I really feel very useful bcos i know nothing abt employing maid. ur blog give me a lot of guides.. Thanks..
I need more advise from u. I know a maid she want to transfer to work for me. Her current employer don't like her. and I'm going to take her. This should be consider transfer maid, right? Can i do the transferring myself without agent help?
if i were doing the transfer myself and not going thru the agent, is the current employer still able to get another maid from her agent?
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Yes she is considered a transfer maid. You must first ask the current employer whether she still has any maid loan with the agency. If the maid has not finished repaying her loan, the employer must send her back to the agency. Otherwise her current employer will not be able to get back her loan, or get another maid from the agency.
You can do the transfer work yourself only if her employer agrees to do so.
Hi,
if you need to install a cctv to manage your maid's day to day activities, please contact yvonnelyc@gmail.com.
I have recently sent my maid away and having no use of my current CCTV.
Here is the link to the CCTV write up: http://global.dlink.com.sg/site_pdtpdfs/DCS-5220/DCS-5220_ds.pdf
We will deliver and do the installation as well...
Hi Tamarind,
Must say that I'm really thankful to have stumbled onto your blog -- only wish I'd done it sooner.
My maid of just 5 days has upped and left this morning -- because we had a "lost" handphone... We just asked her to help us look for it without accusing her.
We've made a missing person's report to the Police -- do we have to cancel her Work Permit?
What happens if we don't?
The agent says there's no need to do so, the Police says it's up to us... so what do you recommend?
Thanks in advance. :)
Just to share my experience with my runaway maid in Oct 08, my 3rd Filipina maid in a year.
I was in a loss what to do then as the agents were away & their Filipina staff told me to wait till they are back. First thing I did was to make a police report (they do accept report within 24hrs). Next I called up the Philippines Embassy to check if she went there which she didn't. Guess what, the staff told me not to employ Filipinas anymore!! I also called up various shelters to check if she went there.
The second day, the agent called from Manila saying she is with the agency's Singapore office but no senior reps from the agency was in Singapore to assist me, just asked me to wait till they are back.
As I did not see her in person, I assume she was still a missing person & did not close the case with the police.
I cancelled the Work Permit after 4days as I did not want to pay anymore levy & wasn't sure how long I have to wait for the agents to be back. Also, I want to send the maid back even though I am going to lose some unpaid loan. She had left my demented dad alone at home on at least 2 occasions besides other mistakes.
I took a risk cancelling the WP as I did not buy the indemnity against the $5,000 bond. I was considering the fact that I would be given 1month to locate the maid before the bond money is forfeited. Even then, I would still be given another 2months to locate & repatriate the maid & get the money back.
fe, you have to check if you have bought that insurance, if you have, no issue with cancelling the WP, you lose $250 & set your mind at ease immediately without having to worry what she might do under your employment. Well, the fact that the WP is still valid, she is under your employment. I am not sure if you need to get the air ticket should you need to repatriate her in your case.
If you cancel the WP within 1st month of employment, you are only charge a minimal sum for the medical & personal accident insurance. Afterwhich, only a certain percentage is refunded based on number of months the maid is under your employment, up till 6months of employment.
There is a reason why the agents are against cancelling the WP as they don't want to lose whatever expenses they have incurred for the maid. If the WP is cancelled and even the maid is found within days, they have to quickly get her a new employer as she may not be granted extension of stay. I supposed you are not taking this maid back to your household anymore. Further, they have to get you another maid.
I hope you get a good maid soon, we will not be getting one in the near future after the bad experience.
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My maid of just 5 days has upped and left this morning -- because we had a "lost" handphone... We just asked her to help us look for it without accusing her.
We've made a missing person's report to the Police -- do we have to cancel her Work Permit?
What happens if we don't?
The agent says there's no need to do so, the Police says it's up to us... so what do you recommend?
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It is best to call or email MOM and ask them what to do.
http://www.mom.gov.sg/publish/momportal/en/header/contact_us.html
Also, check this webpage about missing FDW.
http://www.mom.gov.sg/publish/momportal/en/communities/work_pass/foreign_domestic_workers/during_employment/missing_foreign_domestic.html
If your FDW's WP has not expired at the time of cancellation, you will be given a grace period of one month from the date of the WP cancellation to locate the missing worker for repatriation.
If your FDW is not repatriated by the end of the one-month grace period, your security deposit will be forfeited.
Hi
There's just me and husband in a small flat. Except for hand washing maybe 4 shirts, 3 blouses and 2 lace panties a week, some ironing, everything else is machine washed and dryer, ironing. Cook and clean.
My previous maid (worked for me for 6 yrs, arrived without speaking a word of English at age 20) was able to manage everything on her own in 3 weeks and I was staying in an apartment then twice the size with a sick mother.
I've asked this new maid several times and she maintains that - she is 23 yrs, (she look like 18) studied 13 years as per biodata. She was in training centre for 1 month; was never taught nor asked to do household chores nor cook. She only studied English everday. Is this possible in a maid training centre, no chores at all?
She could barely understand simple English instructions. When I spoke Bahasa Indonesia with a converstion book and dictionary, she appears to understand but did the chores wrong.
I found out a few days later that she did not know how to use a steam iron, the agency said they taught her. I had to teach her all the household chores from scratch.
She has not seen nor eaten butter, broccoli, canned curry chicken. I found out later that she was only looking after a child in her 2 years of working in Jakarta, but know none of the basics of cooking or preparing food.
She burnt her hand using the short serving big spoon for cooking/stiring the rice porriage instead of using the long wooden spoon as I instructed and showed her before.
She appears to be polite, soft spoken and gentle, verging on being manja in her mannerism. There's only so much of 'yes mam, excuse me mam, understand mam...' that I can take and I have to keep repeatingly teach her the same things. She des not appear to be able to think in a logical way or she's just spaced out and not listening or learning instructions. I get stressed having to supervise her everday on her chores incase she breaks something or hurt herself.
I've asked the agent to send me new biodatas and it appears that indon maids are quite short on supply and the dozen that they sent me were not suitable. They are mostly the youngest in the family like this new maid. I took a chance on this new maid when my previous 1st and
2nd selected falied their English test 3 times and were not allow to apply for work permit.
Is 4 weeks too short a time to expect my new maid to be able to manage household chores?
Any advise?
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Is 4 weeks too short a time to expect my new maid to be able to manage household chores?
Any advise?
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Hi,
You really need a lot of patience to train a new maid, especially a maid who has no working experience in Singapore. It may take up to 6 months to train her. However, if you find that your maid has a bad attitude, and she is not motivated to learn, then you should definitely send her away as soon as you can find a replacement maid.
If she has the motivation to learn and is willing to work hard, then it is still worth spending more time and effort to train her.
I wrote down all my instructions on pieces of paper and pasted all over the kitchen for the maid, so I don't have to repeat. If the maid ignores the instructions or still cannot follow instructions, then I will send her away.
Hi Tamarind
Thanks for your advice!
She appears to be busy yet when I check on things like dining table and stuff, it is dusty or not clean. She claims to have cleaned it.
for eg. I teach her to wipe and clean a ladder and watch her for a few mins and check in on her a few times; after 1or few hrs when I inspect the ladder with tissue or clean cloth, it is still dusty or soiled. She says she's wipe it 3 times and she did not clean/wipe the underside of the steps of the ladder. She just keep quiet when I questioned her. Is this considered attitude problem?
She does not seem to understand the meaning of clean. I have already told her I do not want to feel dust whenever I touch anything in the house.
My previous maid, after being told a few times upon 3 weeks arrival to find things to do and keep the house and stuff clean, will sweep the floor few times a day or start wiping/cleaning things without my asking, she will find things to do to occupy her time/appear useful and doing work all by herself.
I have put up 5 pages of instructions and schedule on the fridge for this new maid. Demo to her, clean things myself just to show her. Speak with her in Bahasa Indonesia....
I start feeling confused if it is too much to ask of this new maid to clean thoroughly, but then there's is not much to do in my household?!?!? Please advise if this is indeed attitude problem/ disability in learning. Thanks in advance!
st
I just found new web site which has lots of tips and info with deal with maid. Check it out at http://www.maid-e.com
It may helps.
Hi Tamarind,
How do you ensure that your maid does not drink your beverage? My maid is secretly drinking my girl's milk powder! I was wondering how come each tin of Pediasure runs out so fast!? And let's say she drinks milo, just like us, but the amount of milo she puts in for herself is SUPER rich till we have to top up the milo and condensed milk so often! What can I do about it? I talked to her before but she denies..
Do you all allow your maid to drink your milo and milk powder etc?
Our whole family will go back to China in March for a month holiday and my husband is decided to sent the maid home for holiday too so we brought the return ticket for her but then we notice we have to pay almost SG$400 to the "BUY" her home leave visa. should we just temporary cancel the WP for FDW who is going on home leave ?? any comment PLS.
Hi Tamarind,
I was looking thru the expat sites as i just moved here but i'm on a local package. Most of the people on the expat sites are saying that they have a seperate room with tv, cable and computer for the maid. They say the maid sits with them and eats also. well do we really have to do all these things?...i have been interviewing maids and they somehow have very high expectations! Have the expats spoilt them? or are we really supposed to treat the maid like a princess or somthing..because i cant afford all these things! thanku.
HI Tamarind,
i need your advice.
i have maid who is 10 year older than me. she is with me for 1 and 1/2 months....
She is helpful but will forget at least two to three work per day.....
i've been tolerant.... but not to an extent where she forget to give medicine to my kid.
when we quetion her abt her forgetfullness she will tell stories.... and keep changing her story...
i really do not know what to do with her...
when i found out that she did not do a proper job.... she claims that i'm finding fault with her.
Can you pls help me how can i handle her....
Thanks Much
My maid has been with us for 5yrs. She is a good maid, doing a fairly good job eg. taking care of my youngest child since baby, now 4yrs old in full day childcare. My maid now fetches my elder girl, in P2 now, to & fro her school since the last year. Lately I suspect my maid is seeing a man, probably Bangala man nearby my house. I'm worried if she brings the man home, or sees him 1hr before fetching my girl etc...and it will slowly affect her work and my girl's safety.
We plan to catch her red-handed, take her pic with that man and send to her husband and family back home. But this may be very difficult because we do not have a CCTV, no other adult at home when we're working.
How now? Please advise.
Hi All,
Does anyone allow their maids to have afternoon naps?
I allow because my maid is very "auto" person. She sleeps with my children with the room door open. Sometimes when my baby cries at night, she will take care of her or my older girl goes to the toilet at night my maid will help her & etc. We know she needs sufficient rest so we don't mind if she takes a short nap in the afternoon. She usually take a nap when my baby sleep in the afternoon.
Hi Tamarind
Thank you for this site, is very informative. At present, I have a myanmar maid with me for coming to 6 mths. During her 3rd month with us, she told us that she suspected that she is pregnant because she had missed her period for 1 month and she claims that she has sex with her boy friend in Myanmar before coming to Singapore. My agent bought her for urine and blood tests and the result are negatives but she insist that she is pregnant. Do you think she has mental problem or is trying to create problem so that we can send her back? My family and agent keep assuring her that she is not pregnant. Later on, her periods came and recently she told us she has obdominal pain. Should we send her back?
Hi,
Does anyone allow maids to go on off day? If yes, do you ask what they do and where they go? Or should we give them privacy?
My concern is that we as employers are fully responsible for their medical expenses. In the event that they got into an accident or hurt themselves during off day. We are to pay for their full medical fees. We can claim from the medical and accident insurance however there is a value cap. We have to top up the differences.
My helper is only on the medical insurance as we got her before July 2008. So the max coverage is $5K, beyond that we have to pay. Should I top up with accident coverage even though not required? Or prevent her from going on off? Or am I too paranoid?
Hi,
I just want to ask if employers should foot the maid's Dental Bill?
My maid might need her rotten tooth extracted and i'm just wondering if i can deduct from her salary or I'm expected to foot the bill.
Recently in Dec'08, i got my maid Hendi in Katong.
As usual we believe that when we treat our maid good, she will work happlier in our family.
So we bought her to M'sia for a week trip in my sister in law hse. From here, we will shock that she had confided to the other maid that she had just completed her school and this is her first working experience. So this put us think that the bio data provided by the Agent does not tally in anyway. So we began to monitor her work and bahaviour. True enough, she does not know how to cook, mop the floor clean (1hour), hang clothes (2hours to hang 5 bamboo), simple manner and had repeatedly burn our clothes (countless) during iron. And worst is that she never admit her wrong doing while we caught her red handed and lying is like a daily bread for her.
So because of this, we had repeatedly ask the agent to replace but still could not even after 4 months where we voluntarily teminate the contract and look for a new agent.
So being an employer, we are not being protected well but just have to pay more for getting a higher educated maid which cannot fulfill the household choice. Is there a way where we can be guarantee on better quality maid as education is not a concern here.
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Does anyone allow maids to go on off day? If yes, do you ask what they do and where they go? Or should we give them privacy?
My concern is that we as employers are fully responsible for their medical expenses. In the event that they got into an accident or hurt themselves during off day. We are to pay for their full medical fees. We can claim from the medical and accident insurance however there is a value cap. We have to top up the differences.
My helper is only on the medical insurance as we got her before July 2008. So the max coverage is $5K, beyond that we have to pay. Should I top up with accident coverage even though not required? Or prevent her from going on off? Or am I too paranoid?
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My maid has one off day every 2 weeks. I don't ask her where she goes. I think that we should give maids the privacy.
Yes we are fully responsible for their medical fees. But we really cannot worry too much. You should top up the accident coverage if it gives you peace of mind.
Employing a maid is like gambling, and employers must be prepared to lose money.
A maid is only working for us for a salary, just like we work for our companies. We should treat them with respect and dignity.
Don't worry ladies, carry on with your comments...! I believed if most of us are given better options, getting one will never cross our mind!
If employing a maid is such a easy task, this blog should not have appeared in the first place!!!
Hi. Thank you very much for all the useful information. My maid have been with me for almost 2years. If I would to extend her another 2years contract, how much should I increase her pay? And if I were to get a new maid, what are the fees involve? Thank you very much for your help.
I'm thinking of getting my previous Indonesian maid to come back to work for me. I know my maid's passport is valid for another 2 more years. What are the things I need to do to bring my Indon maid to Singapore without going through to Maid Agency? Can my Previous Indon maid just come to Singapore like this? What does she need to do before she could come out to Singapore? Does the Indonesian Custom there allow her to exit her country just like this? What are the possible cost that the Indonesian Maid need to incur even if she does not go through a maid agency to come work for me again. Thanks.
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Hi. Thank you very much for all the useful information. My maid have been with me for almost 2years. If I would to extend her another 2years contract, how much should I increase her pay? And if I were to get a new maid, what are the fees involve? Thank you very much for your help.
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The pay increase should depend on her performance. I have given my maid $80 to $100 increment before, because I think that her performance is very good. Other employers normally only give $10 to $20 increment after 2 years, if the maid's performance is only average.
If you get a new maid, you will have to pay all the agency fees, maid loan, etc. Please read this webpage :
Cost of employing a maid
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I'm thinking of getting my previous Indonesian maid to come back to work for me. I know my maid's passport is valid for another 2 more years. What are the things I need to do to bring my Indon maid to Singapore without going through to Maid Agency? Can my Previous Indon maid just come to Singapore like this? What does she need to do before she could come out to Singapore? Does the Indonesian Custom there allow her to exit her country just like this? What are the possible cost that the Indonesian Maid need to incur even if she does not go through a maid agency to come work for me again. Thanks.
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You must apply a new work permit for your previous maid before she can work for you in Singapore.
There are many steps, you can read this webpage from MOM for the details.
FDW Application
I don't have any experience bringing in maids without an agency before. You can email MOM if you have more questions.
Hi Tamarind, thanks for all the useful info on this site.
I'm having problems managing my current Filipino maid. She's very lazy and after working 2.5 weeks for me has requested that she be allowed to rest (ie. sleep) during the day when she has finished all her work!! She works quite fast and she tends to finish her assigned work quickly. But working in a household, there's always things to be done if she has the initiative, like wiping windows, scrubbing kitchen etc. She is now sleeping every single afternoon and it's getting on my nerves!!!! I am SAHM and I don't get to nap everyday but my maid does! What do I do?? I feel like sacking her but a good maid is so hard to come by these days and after all she is able to finish all her assigned work... Pls advise.
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What do I do?? I feel like sacking her but a good maid is so hard to come by these days and after all she is able to finish all her assigned work...
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If she is not giving you any other problem, then you should try to work it out.
It is difficult to find a maid with initiative to find work to do when she is free. My current maid will not sit around and do nothing, she will always find some work to do. But we cannot expect every maid to be like that.
I would advise you to list down all the work that you would like her to do when she is free. For example :
1. Clean all shelves
2. Clean window grilles
3. Clean kitchen cabinets
...
List down everything that you can think of. If she is really so fast and completes all the task and still have spare time, then you have a super maid :) It is OK to let her rest lah.
Hi Tamarind
I've this maid for 5 months now, I would first ask her if she has clean this area, she answers yes and when I find some thing that is not clean, she will just say sorry, maybe she clean not thorough. I feel that she is always trying to get away with doing a sloppy cleaning job. This happens almost every week. She have this pitiful look on her face and it just makes me more angry. Many times she does not follow instructions and ruin things, eg my pantyhose washed using some other basin then the one I asked her to use. Or household items that chip, scratch or break because she did not use it the way I instructed her to. She is always trying to guess and talk/answer before I finish talking/instructing her. At first I thought she was smart and understood what I was saying but later found out it was not the case when the chore was done and not what I wanted. She keeps putting on this pitiful face and say sorry but make the same mistakes or not following instructions accordingly.
I've bought several book/dictionaries. I doubt very much she is not understanding my bahasa, she can look at the dictionary and understand the words. She's just not listening or lazy to try to listen to instructions. She's not even trying to speak English and she passed her entry test 1st time. I suspect she is trying to wear me down and do as little as possible. There's only me and husband in a small flat now, she can't even cook despite I've teached her several times. Any advice? Thanks.
st
ST,
My maid is just like your maid. When wiping table, will not remove things from table before wiping. Simply wipe around the things. Cleaning is quite bad, with food particles still stuck on bowls, spoons etc. Lipstick marks on cups not washed off. Table cloth is oily despite her claim of soaking and scrubbing it. Take things from my room without asking for permission.
When I pointed out her mistakes, tears would start rolling off. Need to 'sayang' her by telling her she is performing well. She is with me close to 4 months. At the beginning, I tolerated her nonsense, but this is getting irritating as she does it pretty often. The worst thing is her attitude. She oten ignored my mum and refused to answer when my mum talks to her.
I am sacking her soon. Waiting for my new maid to arrive. No choice but to return her to the agent for transfer.
Very nice advice here, Tamarind. I think all prospective employers should read this before they get a maid. I especially agree with:
-always supervising the maids with your precious babies/young kids
-giving days off
-not controlling every single aspect of the maid's life
Our maids mostly eat the same food as us since we don't really eat very expensive food at home. But each member of the family has a little bit of their "own special food" that no one touches. Like, my mom has her own brand of tea no one else uses, Dad has his coffee, my bro has his chips, I have sweet pastries, etc.
It's just common sense, IMHO.
Maids aren't dumb as THAT. If we have food that everybody can eat (Gardenia bread, fried chicken wings, whatever) then she can eat it, too. If I bring home expensive cheese that even my own brother can't touch - then the maid can't eat it, either. :)
We never had to articulate this at all with the 10+ maids we have had in the last 10 years.
Hi, I have a problem with my maid as she keeps lying and I thought of sending her home.
Can someone advise how do I do that? Can I just bring her back to the maid agency & let the maid agency arrange to send her back?
Thanks in advance.
Good maid is hard to find now. My 1st maid was very good. Smart, learn fast & very capable. Too bad, she want to marry her sporean boyfriend. So she din extend her contract with me. Instead, she reccommanded her classmate to me who is now in her 2nd contract with me. Work not so clean but she treat my children very well. Obedient too and never late to come back on time during her day off. In the middle of her 2nd contract, something bad happend to her child back home. She left us for a year before coming back. During this one year, I had 2 maids. They are also educated, can understand instructions BUT just don have the committment in our family. They just do work, not interested to play with my kids. Sometimes stubborn want to do things in their own way. Also EAT LIKE A COW. not sure is it b'cos they are greedy (1st time to work overseas) Sigh.... so, close one eye lor in order to survive. Until the old maid return, then our lives are back to normal.
Can I know how to manage a maid when your kid is in sch in the day and no one is around to supervise the maid for half a day? Would really like to employ a maid to take care of everything in the hse and looking after my kid...sigh..
Same situation here. I am thinking of getting a maid to help me with household chores. My 2.5 years old son will be in childcare full day. With no one at home during the whole day (7:30am - 7:30pm), do you think the maid will behave herself? I don't want to leave my toddler son with the maid at home whole day as I want him to interact with others in childcare setting. But I will still need the maid to stand-by at home in case my son falls sick and cannot be sent to childcare and we parents cannot take leave for many days. I want to know if anyone has done such arrangements. Any suggestion on how to manage the maid in such a case? Will the maid feel so bored? I am currently SAHM but planning to go back to work and thinking of getting a maid.
Personally I think it is alright to leave the maid alone at home, while the kids are in primary school or full day childcare.
There is no need to worry about the maid feeling bored. List down a list of tasks for her to complete. If you are worried that she invites strangers into your house or goes out without permission, put your house keys in an envelope and seal it, then give it to her (do not lock her in !). She will have to explain why she has to open the door.
For the child who is home for half a day and will be alone with the maid, since he is already 7 years old, he should be old enough to report to you how the maid treats him. Tell him not to be afraid of the maid and that he must tell you everything that she has done to him. However, if your child is timid, then it is probably NOT a good idea to leave him alone with the maid. I am especially worried for girls.
Thanks for your advise, Tamarind..what if I need the maid to bring my kid to sch in the morning? How should I handle her? I am afraid that she will invites strangers to my hse..
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Thanks for your advise, Tamarind..what if I need the maid to bring my kid to sch in the morning? How should I handle her? I am afraid that she will invites strangers to my hse..
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You can install a CCTV or webcam. I normally do not advise employers to install CCTV to spy on their maids, but I guess if you really cannot trust your maid, you can install a webcam in the living room to make sure that she does not invite strangers into your house.
Installing a CCTV is expensive. One very cheap alternative is to put a webcam, connected to your PC, then use www.skype.com which is free. Set your skype to automatically accept incoming calls. Tell your maid that you will call in to check at any time, and that you can see her through the camera. Then she will not dare to do anything funny.
Thank you so much for your response, Tamarind.
Your idea of "putting the house key in the envelope and seal it " is very unique and I like it.
This site is really very useful. I get to hear all the real situations and practical solutions.
Hi, I have a filipino maid of 2 week. she is 27 yrs old (two years younger than me). i bought her a table fan and now she requested for a hair dryer. should i still give her? what should i do?
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Hi, I have a filipino maid of 2 week. she is 27 yrs old (two years younger than me). i bought her a table fan and now she requested for a hair dryer. should i still give her? what should i do?
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If you have a hair dryer, it is OK to let her use it. There is no need to buy a new hair dryer for her.
If what she requests for is reasonable and does not require you to spend money, it is fine. But if she starts asking you to buy this and buy that, then you should just ignore her. Just conveniently forget about it. She can ask as many time as she wants, you don't need to entertain her.
My maid left on her own accord..I told her shape up or ship out. She chose the later.Two days later she wanted to come back.So she is back with us..but she hasn't change much.Work still pretty sloppy.I read a post of how the maid is always lying..my maid lies all the time..you really don't know who you are dealing with...Thanks for you site.
Yes exactly, in some moments I can say that I agree with you, but you may be making allowance for other options.
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Hi After a terrible experience with a new maid, i decided to hire a transfer maid however after checking thru her employment records she was with 1 employer for 3 yrs from 2006 to 2009followed by 2 employers in 2009 the latter lasted about 2 to 3 months however i felt that everybody deserve a 2nd chance but now i am begining to have 2nd thoughts about her, In her 1st week with me
1) I lost my white gold chain with jade.I told her that i would like to see the chain back and that i intend to call in the police to report the loss, her reply to me was to call the police. I was very sure that i left my chain on my drawer and i searched my room including my bed for it. The strange thing was that in the afternoon when i was not in ,she told my MIL that she found the chain on my bed.
2)My maid even asked my MIL if she took the chain in the first place and she came to tell me that my MIL was the one who put my chain on the drawer . Obviously my MIL told me that she never put my chain on the drawer...i am wondering if this maid is trying to sow discord between me and my MIL? When i questioned my maid about she accusing my MIL of taking my chain, she denied point blank.
3) I discovered my ceramic bowl including my hairband in her cupboard. She took it from my bathroom without my permission.Is that considered stealing or am i being too sensitive?
4) She has her own rm to sleep except that we were to get her a fan. Without asking she went to sleep in my kids'rm in the middle of the night and she told me the next day when i questioned her that there were mosquitoes in her rm so she went to sleep in the aircon rm so i told her i will buy the mosquitoe coil to keep the mosquitoes away her answer was very quick that she doesnt need the coil, if i could get the fan it will be ok.
5) I specifically told her not to bring my kids to the playground and i discovered from my kids that she brought them, and she says it was my kids who told her that my hubby okayed it.
6) This maid keeps telling me about her past employer that the employer's MIL couldnt get along with her and the employer will side with the MIL which resulted her transfer a few months ago.
I have laid down my expectations and the house rules that honesty is the best policy in my house but that doesnt seem to be getting thru to her.....What is yr advice on how to handle this maid....she is rather street wise.
Hi Tamarind,
My maid of 5 months. Works from 6:30am to 9:30pm on weekdays and 7:00am to 9:00pm on weekends excluding afternoon naps. I did plan to give her 2x/mo on her 7th month with us plus salary increase. She eats what we eat, and, sometimes more. And, this is what she gave us back:
1) Openly discuss to us, and other maids that she has a married BF overseas and who sends her money. I think, she's a Psycho.
2) Ask for cash advance many times, which I refuse and told her in case of emergency only. But, recently she made-up a story that her father is in the hospital. Wondering, I've called her family back home to ask how's their father. They told me he's fine and not in the hospital.I went blank with anger.
3) She repeatedly told me that she will get married or get pregnant by 2010 or 2011. By who? that I don't know. I was really shocked.
4) Liar. Sloppy worker. Often cry when I talk to her in my most calm voice when I try to tell her mistakes and shortcomings.
5) Spread gossips about us to other maids. which are untrue. I've just found out.
6) Ask me to buy her-- short-shorts and spaghetti shirt while working, because it's too hot. I told her, I buy her a maid's uniform - she's so upset.
7) Talks with my baby in a loud shrill voice. (She thinks she's singing)
8) Didn't clean the oven for a month, thus, ants are everywhere in the kitchen and bedrooms.
9) I feel that my 13 yr old daughter is more matured than her.
Sigh! I've just given her $150 secretly when I returned her to the agency (I regretted it, I know, I'm too nice). Top it all, her maid agency fee was already paid by me. And now, I still have to pay the agency S$12/day board and lodging while they are scouting for her new employer. If she goes home, need to buy her plane ticket. SIGH!
Is this my fault?
Hope, MOM will give Psycological test to all maids as one of the requirements. I mean, REAL PSYCHOLOGICAL TEST!
Hi,
Ive a problem. Problem is me N also maid . Me cos im fussy of how they do the work. myself when i clean the house i make sure it is clean so i expect they do same n watever instructions given they never done it Thsi is frustrating> n more frustrating is i feel like im a thief and they (as in maid) are detective, observing whatever i do LIke no privacy for me. talking to frds or family their ears are open wide but when we called them They claim cant hear??? idiot right???
what i hate most is they never admit their mistake and pretending to be nice and innocent of my others family members.......
What should i do ?? how do i tell her >?? cos whenever i tell or talk to her what she is doing is wrong its is more like im talking to deaf person....
danger part abt them is when they bend down obvoisly u know what i mean Infront of man they do not bother abt it but when bending down infront of me (im a woman) so why must she cover when she bend down??? but never covered infront of the man in house???
i do understand that they are not stupid and they are actually cunning they knew what pissed u off THey will do it to make u angrya n prove to ur other fam member that u r at fault!! geez how do i settle this??? i hate it when whatever we buy(our personal stuff) they will want to know or see frustrating seh!!!
I have the same problem with my maid.Putting on her 'victim'face where clearly she is quietly defying your instructions.
Tamarind..you are doing a GREAT job.This is the place where I can keep my sanity...
Hey Tamarind, I'm thoroughly impressed by your article. Is there any way or anyone who has these guidelines or instructions in Tagalog (Filipino language). Please help....
Hi, I'm writting on behalf of my friend whose maid has ran away. what should my friend do now after lodging police report. The family did not buy run away insurance. The WP & Passport still with agent, she run away without any ID.
Heard that the maid wanted to go back agency but the agent disagree because of the outstanding loan. Everyone believe that the agent must have threaten her that trigger maid to run away from my friend's house. The agent and/or agency ignore this case totally. They dont bother to call up the employer neither they assist and/or advise them what they should do?
Is it that agency out there is to just earn commission and pass the maid to employer & hack care everything? Since i know which is the agency i will circulate to my other friends & colleagues never go to the agency anymore.
Please give some advise, they are waiting but no idea how long will that take to solve it. Thank you..
Hi Tamarind,
My MIL has decided to shift back to her own place after I sent my kids to fullday CC, leaving my maid at home alone to do housework and cooking.
Putting keys and seal in envelope. My hubby also came up with this idea and I think this is good and effective to track that the maid do not leave the house alone unneceesarily while NOT locking her out.
Instead of Webcam/ CCTV, Singtel has an innovative introduction (think about 2 yrs back).
It is called the MobileLive Cam where no installation is required. You can dial in to view and spotcheck on what your maid can do anytime anywhere (and record the viewings, where necessary). Each camera cost about $200.
I got this idea from my colleague who leaves his maid at home while his kids goes to fullday childcare.
Every mth, he pays about $20 for the service - The subscription and access fee.
I am getting this Mobile LiveCam to monitor my maid at home.
Just something to share with families putting their maids alone at home.
Hi Tamarind! Great blog and very useful information.
I have found someone and do not require going through the employment agency. What are the risk I am under taking?
I intend to pay her slightly more than what most of the DH are getting and let her manage her own toiletries and food, is this allowed? Surely, I will include this in her contract.
Perhaps you can give me some views on these.
Thanks!
Hi Tamarind! Great blog and very useful information.
I have found someone and do not require going through the employment agency. What are the risk I am under taking?
I intend to pay her slightly more than what most of the DH are getting and let her manage her own toiletries and food, is this allowed? Surely, I will include this in her contract.
Perhaps you can give me some views on these.
Thanks!
RE: "Read page 10:
An exception may be made for FDWs who accompany their employer's children to a caregiver's home to care for the children under the caregiver's supervision. In this case, the FDW must agree to the arrangement and should not be asked to do the full load of housework in both homes."
Is this true?
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"RE: "Read page 10:
An exception may be made for FDWs who accompany their employer's children to a caregiver's home to care for the children under the caregiver's supervision. In this case, the FDW must agree to the arrangement and should not be asked to do the full load of housework in both homes."
Is this true? "
So long as your maid agrees, there is no problem. If you have any further doubts, you can email MOM and check with them.
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"I have found someone and do not require going through the employment agency. What are the risk I am under taking?
I intend to pay her slightly more than what most of the DH are getting and let her manage her own toiletries and food, is this allowed? Surely, I will include this in her contract."
There is no risk. But you need time and effort to do all the paperwork. In fact, it is a lot safer than going through an agency, because you don't have to pay the maid loan. You will be surprised at how much money you save.
You certainly can give her extra money to manage her own food and groceries.
Hi Tamarind,
I really enjoy reading your blog, can say almost everyday. There're a lot ofuseful and pratical information on daily events. Please keep doing this blog and keep us posted with news/new topics to comment. So nice to have you in Singapore!
Hey
I am engaging a maid for IR Employment Agency... the staff told me that in the event if we want to send the maid home, we can't do it "secretly" now anymore?
The maid has to be made aware and acknowledged the fact that she will be repatriate home then we can cancel her WP and send her home. Is that true????
Bliss
I had just send my maid home about a month ago. I cancelled WP online and send her away thereafter. She realised when she was at airport. Never heard of such rule.
Will the employer breach any law reading the SMSs in the maid's handphone?
I am not a lawyer, so I don't know whether there is any law against reading the maid's SMS.
But remember that the maid is our employee, working for us only for a salary. We should treat her in the same way as our boss treats us, with respect and dignity.
Hi Tamarind, i will have a maid tormorrow for the first time. shall i ask what kind of food she likes cuz i dont know what she eats in her country, i'm afraid to ask fro expensive things. the most important problem is i dont know how to clean a house, how to clean the toilets cuz in my family house maids do that, i'm afraid that she recognize this and starting to disrespect me and to not obey me. please help me
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"Hi Tamarind, i will have a maid tormorrow for the first time. shall i ask what kind of food she likes cuz i dont know what she eats in her country, i'm afraid to ask fro expensive things. the most important problem is i dont know how to clean a house, how to clean the toilets cuz in my family house maids do that, i'm afraid that she recognize this and starting to disrespect me and to not obey me. please help me"
Do not ask what kind of food she likes. Instead, ask what kind of food she cannot eat. Then tell her that you will not let her eat the food she cannot eat, but other than that, she cannot choose her food.
It is important to be strict at the beginning, then slowly relax the rules if your maid turns out to be good.
Write a list of house rules for her. If you don't like her to mix her underwear with your clothes together in the washing machine, make sure you write down in black and white.
Once you have the list of house rules, she will not dare to disrespect you.
As for cleaning instructions, you can just leave it to the maid to do it her own way. Then if you find that the toilet is not clean, ask her to clean it again.
I may sound harsh, but remember to say everything in a cool, calm manner. The maid should know that she is working for you.
Hi Tamarind,
Thankyou for all the time and effort you put in to maintain this blog, I find it extremely useful and go through it regularly.
My new maid has a sis working here, she doesn;t like the food we make at home and on the behest of her sis she called the agent when i wasn;t at home and complained abt the food! She did not say a word to me. She told the agt that 'food no enough', even though i got her own bag of rice, bread, noodles, biscuits,chips, jam and a tray of 30 eggs.I returned the butter i got for her from ntuc and got jam instead because she said 'no like butter'
She could eat all the food we cooked at home, she would just not eat saying 'no like'. I am extremely upset, but her work is good, so I've reluctantly allowed her to cook her own food. What do you think??
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"She could eat all the food we cooked at home, she would just not eat saying 'no like'. I am extremely upset, but her work is good, so I've reluctantly allowed her to cook her own food. What do you think??"
Some maids are really very hard to please.
It is perfectly fine to let the maid cook her own food. In fact, I have always asked my maids to cook their own food, because my hubby and I work all day and we eat most of our meals outside. My maid only cooks for the kids, and my mother is on a special diet of no oil and salt. My mother insists that kid eat very little oil and salt too. So the best solution is to let the maid cook whatever she wants to eat.
You can ask the maid to cook more during lunch, so she does not have to cook again for dinner.
My maid often cook a big pot of food for herself, then freeze in the fridge. She takes out a small portion and re-heat to eat for a few days. She does this on her own initiative.
Hi Tamarind
I fumbled on your blog while looking for a security camera for my hse to spy on my new maid who will be coming on board in a week's time.
Your blog is indeed informative. I've my current maid for the past 7 yrs and she is a tranfer from my sister so all in all she has been with our family for 12-13 years.
We trusted her totally. She eats what we eat. She even help to discipline my children when they are misbehaving. Sometimes she does the counselling job for us between our children and us. Cos handling children is really not an easy job nowadays.
Sad to say she has to go back for her cyst operation which we found out during her 6mthly check up and she is almost 40yrs old. We are letting her rest for a year or 2 while we get a new maid to replace her.
I am really keeping my fingers and toes crossed for all those horrible stories that everyone has shared in your blog.
These stories make me worry very much now as I do not have any of such issue with my current maid at all.
I have a mixed feeling now. Happy to be able to select a new maid but worry that what the new maid will be able to handle my kids and worst worry whether she will eat up all the food, do hanky panky stuff behind our back or not.
My new maid worked in hk before from 2003-2006 and before that worked in Saudi Arabia too. And before Singapore she worked in Malaysia too. She finished all her contracts as what stipulated in her bio data.
I've met her and she is able to converse well in cantonese. Quite fair bit of English and Mandarin too. After I confirmed her my friend warn me about how good life the HK maids are and they may not be able to take it in SG.
And the salary maids got from Saudi and HK are so much better in SG and why dun she go back to these countries to work ?
We may also need time to accept a new maid as we are so use to the current maid afterall it's been 7 yrs.
I will definitely ask you for advice when things happen.... *touchwood* *touchwood*
Hi Tamarind,
I am so glad to have found your website. It is indeed very informative.
I have a new maid from Philipines (She's 32 with 3 kids, youngest 3 yrs old) and barely 4 days into the job, she has chut so many patterns.
1. Excessive crying. She just cry everyday at my mum's place and at my place. Say she miss her daughter. First, i pity her, now it's driving me nuts.
2. HP. At the agent, i told her no hp for 6 months, but i'll let her call home whenever she wants when she does her job properly. First day, she did a wonderful job cleaning up my house, then come to me in tears saying she miss her daughter a lot, ask if she can have her handphone back cos all her daughter's pics are inside. i regretted cos the moment i did, she started to give me attitude like not paying attention when i talk to her or walking away even before i complete my words.
3. I let her rest at 9 pm, waking up at 6am. But she only woke up on time on the 1st day. 2nd and 3rd day i need to wake her up myself. When i ask her why, she said she wake up already but was cleaning her room. Erm, her lights wasn't even on the first place.
4. She has been getting more bold, like getting out of the house without permission, requesting if i can give her my son's toys to send back to Phillipines (personally, i wouldn't mind, but what does this tell you of a 4-day old worker?), snacking anytime she like, and sleeping while making my son sleep.
5. She is like living in grief (face always black, with red swollen eyes) for the past 4 days that it is starting to freak me out. I leave my 8 month old baby with her under my mum's supervision. My mum does goes out sometimes and cannot be in the room with them all the time. I really don't feel comfortable leaving my son with such a person.
I gave her a list of house rules on day 1, highlighting the important stuff only. But obviously she did not read the rest, appearing in a sleeveless top this morning, dumping her clothes in my washing machine despite me telling her to handwash.
I really need a sanity check now. Am i going too far or asking too much? Understand that its tough for them to leave home to a foreign land to work. But are new maids so weepy? Now i fear that she can't control her emotions at all.
Would installing a CCTV help?
She is my first maid. Based on my description, does it warrant enough reason for me to change a maid? or should i adjust my expectations?
I will really appreciate your advice.
This is a common tactic by maids if they don't like the employer. Your maid has shown that she is capable of doing a wonderful job on the first day. However, after she learned more about you, she decided to find an easier job elsewhere. So she puts up a show, hopefully you will send her away so that she can try out another new employer.
There is nothing that you can do. You are certainly not asking for too much. She is not working for you for free. You are paying her a salary that she cannot hope to get in her home country.
CCTV is not going to help since She does not even do as you say.
We can change maid for any reason. There is no need to explain to anyone. There is no need for you to adjust your expectations. If you want a good maid, you must be prepared to change a number of times.
Hi,
I found quite a lot of people get help from you in your blog, me too!!! I also need some advice or suggection from you.
I just employ a new maid since 21 May 10 till now.On four days with us, we were been told by this maid she have sick of amnesia, but in her bio-data never state it and also never told by agent. We been train her within two weeks, but from the way she working,we found that she can close the door without lock it(after an hour later, i came out from room then i realise it). She can keep pressing the gas without see the fire out and only smell of gas which she never realise it etc.
We were quite angry and and we do call up the agent. From the way of agent told, she might not understand what we ask about, she is only that kind of quite forgetful person not consider sick of amnesia. Agent keep explaint this and that. The action of agent is let us feel that irrespondsible and service very bad, because we been paid advance for the maid loan and cheque been clear in this agent account, she did say change another new maid but we still need made payment to her.
We understand that no matter how,we need to paid the insurance for new maid and get only 70% refund of insurance for the maid we got problem now but we dont feel pay any extra money to this agent anymore, because we felt that we were cheated by not giving true information for the previous maid., so i would like to ask about your advise or any suggection? I'm sorry if my english is poor for you to understand..
Hi angietay75,
Don't worry about the English.
What happened to you is quite common. I also had maids who could not do work properly, the agent just gave all sorts of excuses. I would advise you to send her back to the agent and get a new maid. Most agencies allow employers to change at least one maid without having to pay the maid loan and agency fee again.
If your agency refused to let you change maid or return your maid loan, you can still send your maid back to her own country. Buy her an air ticket, and cancel her work permit. To get back the maid loan, you can try :
Small Claims Tribunal
I have heard some employers getting back their loan after lodging a complain at Small Claims Tribunal, though it is not guaranteed to work, you can still try.
If you don't want to risk losing your maid loan, then the only way is to try to be very patient and train your maid. I know that this is very difficult, but there is not much choice for employers in Singapore.
Even if you get a new maid, she may also be bad. We have no choice but to be prepared to change maids until we are lucky enough to get a good one. The lesson learnt is never to believe in what the maid agency promise about a maid.
Hi Tamarind,
Thanks for your advice re my maids food, I am referring to my query about my maid from Myanmar calling the agent within the first week and complaining that she doesn;t like the food.
I had permitted her to cook whatever she wants, but she hardly does so,think she's too lazy to do it. Now she's eating our food without any complaints!
But a shocking incident came to light a couple of days ago. My 7 year old daughter told me the maid hit her inside the mouth, while feeding her, with a spoon. She first put the food in her mouth, then brought it between my daughters front lower teeth and gums and hit her. She then left my daughter and went to the kitchen, when she came out again, my daughter asked her why she did that? The maid sais"oh, sorry, sorry". She did not ask my child if she got hurt or to open her mouth to look. My daughter said" I'll eat myself. don't feed me" and the maid just put down the spoon and walked away!! I was out at that time. I questioned the maid and she admitted to doing so, but says it was an accident. I can't imagine, how she can poke her in her lower gums by accident. My daughter actually liked the maid a lot.I threatened to report this to the police and MOM if she repeats it again, there was no sorry, the maids expression was totally blank.This happened a couple of days ago,I'll be returning her to the agency, but dread to think what would happen if she gets employed by someone with younger kids or babies. I just think she lost her temper at my kids' slow eating and did this. I can;t even send her back or blacklist her because I've paid up her loan.
Quote:
"But a shocking incident came to light a couple of days ago."
We never really know what the maid is thinking when she does something like that. If I were you, I would not be able to trust her anymore. My advise is to observe her closely, do not threaten her because some maids can go crazy after being threatened. At the same time, start looking for another maid, and send her away as soon as you have recovered your loan.
Hi
I just hired an ex-sin maid for 2 months now.
To help my mom take care of my 14 mos son and newborn daughter. So far I'm very happy with her except she scratched my parquet floor when doing the cleaning. Today I found a list of items she is preparing to send home. In the list include eg 10 tubes toothpaste, 10 bottles shampoo, 10 bottles body soap, baby shampoo, baby powder,food items like chocolates, canned food, coffee powder, curry paste, chili sauce, oyster sauce, noodles, milk powder, etc, household cleaning items like toilet cleaner etc. Is she planning to buy these items but I can't help thinking she is planning to steal from me should I be concerned ?
Hi Tamarind,
I was the person that posted on Jun 4. Thank you for your advice. We decided to keep the maid a little longer to monitor the situation. It has been 3 weeks since she arrived, needless to say, encountered many of her sob stories and antics. The only reason why she's still with us is she does a great job handling my son who previously is a fussy eater and sleeper. He improved his feeds and growth under her care.
Tamarind, do you mind touching on 2topics in your forum?
1. Usage of phone cards. What is the typical arrangement of phone cards for new maids? Which brand to buy? As the new maid has no money and still owe employer $, do employers typically buy phone cards for their maids. I gave my maid a $10 phone card and she used it within a night. And then cry cry, say she dunno the rates (i did tell her it is 20 cents a min)say her daughter very sick, her daughter miss her, refuse to eat, need to talk to her daughter. In the end, i relented and let her use my house phone. Nevertheless, everyone around me scold me for being too soft hearted.
2. Maids asking for loan. Yes, mine has opened her mouth, saying she need to buy medicine for her daughter. If no medicine, her daughter might die... (followed by crying and sobbing)... sigh
I do symphtise with her background, a useless husband with a sick daughter to take care. But somehow why do i keep having this feeling she's taking me for a ride.
1. MOM does not have any rules stating that employers must pay for the maid's phone bills. So it is up to the employer. I don't mind paying for the phone bills, only if the maid is very good and very hardworking, but there must be a limit.
My current maid never ask me to pay for any of her phone bills. She buys her phone cards using her own money. I allow her to call home as often as she likes using her own phone card, and when she has finished all her tasks for the day.
It is OK to be kind to your maid, but remember that there must be a limit. You can also tell her that you will ask her to pay for the phone bills that she incurred after she finished repaying for her loan. Keep a record and show it to her.
I suggest using www.skype.com, it allows users to call using a computer to any mobile or fixed telephones and the rates are very very cheap.
2. I advise employers never to give loans to maids, unless you have known the maids for many years and you know her character very well.
Actually I do not believe that your maid is telling the truth. I have ex-maids who told bigger lies than your maid.
hi Tamarind,
Wish to seek some advice here.
My new Indo maid of 2 weeks (with home country experience) last night said she wanted to change employer. But this morning retracted saying that she does not want pay another 2 months of salary if going back to agen to change employer.
This is the 1st time I have encountered such a case. Have employed 3 maids before her, all completed contract with me. This latest maid has the easiest life per se as I have made all my household duties so simple that I can just put my only child in student care (P1) if presented with maid issues. My mom whom is staying with me nowadays also "bo-chap" the maid afte she read about the many maid horror stories.
Yet this maid give me such a crappy stuff. When she first came & I checked her luggage, she has much more toiletries and beauty stuff than me !! She will find every sinle chance to sit down & no initiative to help out. When I go home after work with bags of groceries, she will just sit inside her room & treat me as invisible. During her 3rd day with me she asked about any possible relaxation of off-day !!
Apparently she knows about all the ground rules: no off-day, no hp, if go back to agent employer need to top up 2 more monhs of loan, but yet she go ahead and say wants to change employer last night. But this morning said she wanted to work again & looked quite sincere !!!
My options are:
1. Send her back to agent, look for another replacement. But need to train all over again, but can be for better or worse.
2. Student care: My girl is in pm session, needs to reach student care latest by 8am which means she needs to wake up around 7.20am to wash up & take LRT. Worried that she might be too tired as after school she will only reach home around 7.15pm in the evening. Right now she does assessment given by me in the morning without much distraction. At student care centre there might be too much distraction.
if you were me, will you give this maid a second chance? What are the kind of ground rules to set? I did give her timetable & house rules right from the start. But still.....
Apologies on the long post...Hope to pick your brains on this.
Thanks.
I have encountered maids like that before, they are not worried about the job because they know that they can always find a new employer easily. Your maid is obviously not the type who wants to work to earn money in order to support her family. Apparently no one is starving in her family, that is why she happily says that she wants to change employer even though she needs to work extra months without pay.
It is not likely that her behaviour will change. You should be very firm, tell her that she must follow your house rules and there will be no compromise. Do not agree to any of her requests. After a while, she will ask to leave again. There is no point keeping a maid who is not motivated to work for you.
If I were you, I will start to look for a new maid. Then as soon as I find a suitable maid, I will let this one go.
Hi Tamarind, thank you so much for your wonderful blog. I've recently employed an Indonesian maid. At first she worked hard, but recently her performance and appearance has deteriorated. Her attire is untidy, and her attitude bad. Yesterday I caught her stealing food, which I forbid, and when I allocated her additional chores, she gave me a black face. I feel I'm too lenient, as I allow the maid to eat with the family. A dear lady friend who employs many servants recommended that I require the maid to always wear a uniform, and curtsey each time she greets me. My friend insisted that a maid should always stand in the presence of her Mistress, even when eating. What are your thoughts on how I might improve the maid's attitude.
Quote:
" A dear lady friend who employs many servants recommended that I require the maid to always wear a uniform, and curtsey each time she greets me. My friend insisted that a maid should always stand in the presence of her Mistress, even when eating. What are your thoughts on how I might improve the maid's attitude."
I advise employers to treat their maid, in the same that our boss treats us when we are working. We should imagine ourselves in the maid's position, and ask ourselves whether we like to be treated that way if we were working as maids.
I do not treat my maid as part of my family, since my boss also does not treat me as part of his family. My boss does not eat with me, and he does not share his food with me, and I am perfectly happy with that.
My boss does not scream at me or scold me every time I make a mistake. He always speaks in a cool, calm and polite manner to me. I treat my maid the same way too.
It is not necessary to ask your maid to wear uniform, but you can tell her that her attire must be clean and tidy. Maids are also expected to have good attitudes, this should be important part of their job requirement.
I have a feeling that your maid may be thinking of changing employers, she acts that way so that you will send her away. Remember that maids have the freedom to come and go as they please.
Hi Tamarind,
I need some advise from you.
As I have employed new maid from Indonesia about 2 months. My mum is staying with me therefore the maid is helping my mum.
3 weeks ago, my mum told me that my maid was holding a handphone and take a photogragh of herself using the phone. I have asked her and she told me that it was someone downstairs from our blk asking her to help take picture and testing of the camera.
Today, I have open up my cabinet to check my old handphone (which belongs to my collection) is missing. When I ask her whether did she saw my handphone anywhere other than the cabinet. She said she never see it. My neighbours maid have told me that my maid have asked her where to get the phone card. And now I am suspecting her, stolen my 2 preloved model handphone. What should I do? She did offer to check her bag, but I believe she should have not keep it there.
Should I sent her back??? But I am going to due anytime.....
Quote:
"What should I do? She did offer to check her bag, but I believe she should have not keep it there.
Should I sent her back??? But I am going to due anytime....."
You will never know whether she is telling the truth or not. How is her work performance ? If she is very good and hardworking, and has a good attitude, then you may consider giving her another chance. At the same time, keep all your valuables locked up. When we have a maid at home, it is important to keep all our valuables somewhere that cannot be accessed by the maid. I tell my maids that they are not allowed to open another cupboards except those in the kids' room and the kitchen.
Hi Tamarind,
Do you think I can find a LIVE OUT maid in Singapore?
Best Regards
Jesline
Hi Jesline,
Your only choice is a part time local maid. There are many PRs from mainland China working as part time maids here in Singapore.
After my Phil maid of 4yrs left to go home in 2008, I have had 4 maids. First 2 were Phil,and didnt complete 2 yrs. Agent recommended INdon maids. The 1st one was rude to my mother in law, but knows how to please the Sir and Mdm. She dislikes my MIL to oversee her work. We were lenient with her, sympathised her background. She thinks she's indispensible. She gossips with neighbours maid, and questioned me why the earlier maids didnt finish the 2yr. she asked for transfer in her first two week at work... pretended to faint 3 times and climbed the fence to get out of the house at least twice. And then pleaded with us to let her stay on. After 7 months,we sent her back as we had enough of her nonsense. And her performance was bad. The last indon maid worked the shortest... she asked for transfer on her 5th day. I counselled her, agent counselled her thinking that she needed more time to get used to a new country. She told me she would stay. Two days later, my MIL found maid missing, her luggage gone. Maid later appeared in the agent's office - cry and cry. We were coerced to return her documents. I feel so short changed. Employers got no recourse in this situations. I thought I had got a good match when interviewing the maid, and she agreed sincerely to work in my household. They just lie with their eyes open. All they care is to get on the plane to Spore. Then make excuses to get a transfer. So Employers beware. Employer suffer financially and get stressed. Agent happily charge commission to remarket the maid..... Sad but true.
What would you do if you found out that your maid took petty things ? not valuables thou. i recently discovered that she took stupid things like baby's lip balm, bottle of my children's sunblock plus one of their toys which they do not play anymore and kept them in her personal drawer. She is pretty good with my kids and can handle them really well. I am reluctant to confront her over these small things ( since i haven't found any other big items missing yet), and i don't want her to treat my kids differently after that. she looks after 1 year old son without supervision at times .. and so far i think she treats him very well... sigh ... what do you think i should do?
Hi faithmama,
Your maid may think that you don't need the items anymore, so she can keep them. I don't think there is a need to confront her about the things that she has taken before. You can make it very clear to her that she must ask your permission before keeping anything. If she is really a good maid, she will listen to your instructions.
I am thinking of engaging a Filipino Maid. Are they usually literate if I draw up simple Schedule in English for them? Tks :)
ALL maids, Filo or Indon (I have no experience with ones fromm Myanmar)will be able to understand SIMPLE (I stress simple) written schedules given to them. Of course you must first explain the tasks to them. Whether the maid wants to adhere to the schedule is another matter.
Transport osobowy do Holandii i Niemiec, tanio i szybko, busami Opel Vivaro
Hi Tamarind,
i really enjoy a lot of your advices. And also agreed with this person who wrote @June 2010"Employer suffer financially and get stressed. Agent happily charge commission to remarket the maid..... Sad but true." i sent back my maid after 1 1/2 months. good things about her are she wake up in time daily at 6.
30am. start some simple area cleaning. but she really don't even know how to mop! i demo for her to see how to mop step by step by she still can't do it well. then my vaccum spoilt, mop stick broken. we always give her big potion of meals and teabreak too. she will like to do her housechores at her own time without following the timetable when i'm working. so my MIL will correct her and maid talked back to my MIL. but when i'm around then she very obedient. then one day, she argue with my MIL as the cloths wasn't dry enough and maid insisted want to keep as said after iron will dry. so my MIL called me and said this maid is always rude to her and better not to keep her as scare other danger things might happen in future. immediately, when i reached home, i took the maid to the agency without her luggage. i packed her belonging the next day and so surprised to found a unopen big loaf of bread which i've found lost a few days ago, a few packets of biscuits, my daughter hair-clip in her cupboard. but i didn't let my family know as thoughts not to keep bad impression, also i didn't contfront her when i return her luggage in the agency. 4 days later, i found a few apples below the dishwashing basin cabinet, bread again in other cabinet, and also biscuits here and there!! i was so furious.. and by the time ive found all this foods is already mouldy and rotten. so angry.now 2 week already, the agency told me no new data as indo just finished hari raya and my MIL don't want fil. maid. i'll sure to use your house rules for my next maid as when you've mentioned is so real in life that i read a lot of them in this blog. i really don't trust their bio-data anymoe. To me, getting a good maid is just by luck, the biodata won't help much. what they have written inside is all liar.
hi..
I found my maid is taking control pills..I suspected she is sleeping around outside on her day off..are they allow to have boyfriend outside? she asked me to let her stay over night at her auntie house a few times,asked for extra day off when she is already off on every sunday..and most of the time i'm not in singapore and she is alone in sg...
She has been with me since this yr May 2010. What should i do? Please advise
Hi .If yr maid is on birth control pills chances are that she is sleeping around or with her boyfriend. We cant control what they do outside on their off day therefore i would suggest that you refrain from allowing her to stay overnite at her aunt's place, usually it is at some men's place. As for her off day, perhaps u might want to tell her to come back earlier at 4pm instead. If yr maid gets pregnant u could pay the bond when that happens do not tell her just pack her back home.Lastly it is not advisable to leave yr maid at home alone as she will be up to hanky panky.
Hi Merlion,
Thank you for your reply.. Just to check with you, if you know:
1. does birth control pills need to be prescript from the doctor?
2. can i send the maid back to agency and change a new one? is there any penalty to change a new maid?
3. Maid day off, usually, what time should they go out & what time should they come back home?
Hope you could advise me.Hee...
Thanks!
XX
Hi From what i know is that birth control pills are prescribed by the doctors but there is a shop at lucky plaza selling pills to prevent gastric pains this i heard act as a form of birth control to abort the baby, something to that effect. You have to look at yr contract whether yr replacement for a new maid is within the period stipulated by the agency. If yes then the only cost incurred would be just the insurance for the new maid. As for off days it is dependent on you as to what time you want to let the maid off. For me, my maid goes off at 7.30am and is back by 5pm or 6pm if i have something on on that day. Good luck!!
Hi Tamarind,
Please kindly advice... Recently I got a Myanmmar maid and she has been with us for only 2 weeks plus.. I find her very forgetful as I have to remind her several times on a particular task. And the most problem is, in her bio data shows that she know how to handle kids well but she knows nothing. I am expecting now and going to deliver in few weeks time, by then, i wont have much energy to repeat day by day..
And also, may i know if the maid has its own clinic to visit when she is sick? My mil told me the agency shld hv a recommended clinic for the maid to visit with lower fee, is that so?
Hi Tamarind,
I posted on your thread on Jun 4 and Jun 23 in 2010 asking for help. Turns out that the maid that i hired was a maid from hell and i finally sent her back in Dec. (Until now, i am still wondering how can i tahan her for so long)
Her deeds includes extorting money from my 10 year old nephew, bringing my 5 year old nephew out as an excuse to meet her boyfriends (found out she has 3, indians, malays etc), mistreating my one year old, found cigrattes on her when we send her back to the agent... these besides the rude behaviour and lots of accomodation on our side for her antics.
I would like to urge all readers, if you have such a nonsense maid, do not hesitate to write in to the MOM. They respond very fast and the officer in charge was very sympathetic of my situation. I used to think that they will only side with these FDWs, now i realized, they are willing to listen to the employers too.
For my situation, even though there was no criminal offence lodged, the maid was put on a conditional ban. This means that the next time this maid tries to seek employment in Singapore again, MOM will let the prospective employer know that this maid has been complained about before and show them the report we lodged against her. If they are still insistent on hiring, they will have to sign an undertaking that if they are not happy with the maid, they are not allowed to transfer but to send the maid home immediately.
I strongly urge all employers to write to the MOM if you encounter terrible helpers. This way, it is a systemic fix rather than blacklisting the maid on the blog because it may not reach out to all.
Tamarind,
Do you know of the current new practice of hiring Filippino maid? I understand due to their government requirement to set a higher wages for their maids, maids are more difficult to get out of the country. I am looking for a maid now and was told there are maids that went through training and passed their embassy test, and get out of their country through contract with their embassy. The maid agency charges more expensive for these kinds of maid, about $400 and required additional $2000 Indemnity bond and also additional insurance coverage and exit pass fee of about $100 plus. Do you know of this? I am trying to verify what the agents said. Thanks.
Hi Tamarind,
My maid has hinted a few times that she wants to watch TV and that we do not bring her out enough. May i know what's your view on these? Should i get her some books or magazines instead? What are your maid's leisure activities?
Regards to this post
I posted on your thread on Jun 4 and Jun 23 in 2010 asking for help. Turns out that the maid that i hired was a maid from hell and i finally sent her back in Dec. (Until now, i am still wondering how can i tahan her for so long)
Her deeds includes extorting money from my 10 year old nephew, bringing my 5 year old nephew out as an excuse to meet her boyfriends (found out she has 3, indians, malays etc), mistreating my one year old, found cigrattes on her when we send her back to the agent... these besides the rude behaviour and lots of accomodation on our side for her antics.
I would like to urge all readers, if you have such a nonsense maid, do not hesitate to write in to the MOM. They respond very fast and the officer in charge was very sympathetic of my situation. I used to think that they will only side with these FDWs, now i realized, they are willing to listen to the employers too.
For my situation, even though there was no criminal offence lodged, the maid was put on a conditional ban. This means that the next time this maid tries to seek employment in Singapore again, MOM will let the prospective employer know that this maid has been complained about before and show them the report we lodged against her. If they are still insistent on hiring, they will have to sign an undertaking that if they are not happy with the maid, they are not allowed to transfer but to send the maid home immediately.
I strongly urge all employers to write to the MOM if you encounter terrible helpers. This way, it is a systemic fix rather than blacklisting the maid on the blog because it may not reach out to all.
HiHi,
What is the email address to write in?
Samantha
Indonesia maid with Singapore permit can visit and stay in Malaysia for how long ?
Hi,
I posted several questions here before but there was no reply. Is there a maid forum that is more interactive, that we can quickly get advice when we need it? Would appreciate if readers share the sites they know of. Thanks
Quote by Anonymous (Jan 19)
"Hi,
I posted several questions here before but there was no reply. Is there a maid forum that is more interactive, that we can quickly get advice when we need it? Would appreciate if readers share the sites they know of. Thanks"
There's one other site - www.maidlibrary.com.sg - but it's down for maintenance.
Many posters just put their name as 'Anonymous' which makes answering pretty difficult. Could be that your posts were missed. Another thing is don't expect every post here or elsewhere to have an answer.
Enjoy.
How about trying this forum
http://www.kiasuparents.com/kiasu/forum/viewtopic.php?p=331002#331002
Hi
I have a current maid who claimed to have 4 yrs experience in Singapore. I know she has experienced in looking after elderly and children before.Can do simple cooking.
I was so happy when she showed so much initiative in doing things, cleaning the house, taking care of my children... 2 girls.
Unfortunately, come to 2nd mth, she showed signs of deterioting. Forgetful and keeps doing things half way without completing and she would to another task which she remembered she should do. So, ended up, nothing being completed yet everythings turned up to be messy.
I have time and again reminded her and talked to her about finished up a task first before proceeding to next one and to do the impt or task which takes short time to finish up. For forgetfulness, I reminded her to write it down in notebook which I have given her too.
She's also not good in handling children. She's not a very mature woman too though she is 32 yrs old and is a single mother. Cries easily.
But 3 months with me now, she does not show sign of improvement. Even with her own personal stuffs.. like laundry, I have to remind her to hang them up after washing and to dispose her sanitary pad wrapper properly.
The problem I noticed is that this maid is not only forgetful, she works slow too and she is not a very smart person. I would say even basic common sense is lacking. Overall, not an independent worker at all. Even though she takes down note on receipe and cooking method... she also tends to take down the wrong note.
She also like to act smart even though she is not. When in doubt, she does not ask.
Seriously, I dread the idea of changing maid... cos I have to start over again. What's more, she currently has another 4 more mths of loan with me. If I replace her, I have no confident that next maid will be better too.
But many times, I got so frustrated with her repeated mistakes that I lost control and shouted at her. Seriously, I do not feel good about all these myself.
I have been thinking a lot of times... how to help her to work better. But does not seems to work.
Anyone has any advice or experiences with such maid or how I can improve the situation?
I have time-table, house rule, etc given to her...
I really feel very helpless at this present moment.
Joan
Hi Joan
Experienced maids have their ways of doing things. If a person can be good in her work for the 1st month why should not the 2nd, 3rd, 4th etc months be the same?
Have you checked her background before employing her?
Ask your mate (and yourself) to have a good talk with her and find out what's her problems (if any).
will she tell you the truth even though she dont koe how to do???
just tell her that you are only working here for 2 yrs, if she wants to continue, then better wake up before things go out of hands.
some maids can says they kow how to look after babies, and she even got a kid of almost same age as employer, but she dont koe how to differentiate between hot and cold water,
giving the elder kid a flask of very hot water to him to pass to the confinement mummy, and give very cold water for the elder kid for shower,
she does not even koe how to bathe for the baby, OMG,
my current maid, she think she very clever, ask her things & she can tell me another thing,
she can tell me what to do, how to do,
then i ask her, who is the boss, i ask you do things, u better do it correctly, dont act cute
she koe that i dont allow her to have mobile, and yet she can buy (or mayb is the BF who buy & top up for her), once i saw her mobile lying on her bed and i confiscated it, hinting to her to tell the truth but still keep on denying,
so i let it be, no return,
acutally my current maid wanted to continue working for another 4 more yrs, as she dont want to incur so much loans,& to change so many employers.
although her housework is gd, & no problem taking care babies, but she is not telling the truth, so y continue take her if i dont have the trust in her anymore,
what's more, my family start to dislike her ways of handling things, so out she have to go when she finish her contract,
too bad too sad.
Hi
Saw an earlier post, "Should i get her some books or magazines instead? What are your maid's leisure activities?"
I have the same queries too.
My new maid just irritated me with constant bitching of how hard she worked at her ex-employer's house. Actually she only need to take care of an elderly (stroke patient), housework and cook meals for a family of 4 women including herself. No pets, no baby. She has freedom to do marketing. I wonder how hard could the work be. She did not complete her assignment citing tiredness and low pay (was $320 then).
i start to regret choosing her. Agent highly recommended her given her experience with working Singapore and ability to communicate in English. However, I am getting rather irritated when she talks alot like how easy her friend's job is, high pay in HK/ TW, ex-employer giving her paid off-days and rewarding her with mobile phone. I think she is trying to hint at me to be treated with same level of 'kindness'. She also complained about having to work 8months to pay off her loan and how little money she would receive in the first 8 months etc. Frankly, she's been with us for only a week and i already feel like asking for a transfer with all her crap. I am heavily pregnant with my 2nd child and she already asked me if she has to share room with my elder boy and if we would leave her alone with baby. Frankly she came across someone who only wants easy assignment and now regretting her decision to work with us.
Hi all
Just the other day, I asked my maid to pass me her handphone to have a look. she ignored me purposely despite repeating 3 times to her. I literally got mad.
She refused to pass to me but I insisted and she said her friend told her that employer has no right to take their handphone as that's maid personal belonging.
I checked with my agent and agent supported maid. Amazing right?
Agent said it's the same as if your boss wants to check your handphone and you wont allow.
But I told agent so even if employer suspect that maid is on the phone all day and neglecting the works and performing irresponsibily, employer still cannot do anything about it?
All agent said was "cannot say like that, needs to balance up".
Now, I am really not surprised then whey employers are having so much craps from maids these days cos even agents are not supporting employers.
Emily
Never believe in whatever maid said as most of the times, they are just trying their luck to get what they want from employers.
I told maid working with me now that do not compare and contrast what they get at/from their ex employers. I simply told maid that she is now working for me. Moreover, I'm sure there are things which maid may get from present employer but do not have from ex employer too but they did not confess.
Just simply get message across to maid is now is now, past is past.
Time cannot be reversed.
Beware of Lilibeth Mundo Vergara.
My maid of 3 years, suddenly told me late Feb that her idiot husband has a new woman and baby was just born, imprisoned her kids and stopped them from going to school. She was upset to forfeit sch fees paid up for the rest of 2011 and 12 yr old daughter cannot graduate from junior school. We sympathised with her, she needed to annul marriage and file for custody of kids. She kept assuring me that she would definitely prefer to work for employers she is familiar with. I am her 1st employer. Even up to the car ride to the airport, she assured my hubby she will return asap. I had asked my company to allow me to work from home so I can look after the kids.
However, after she left, we heard from mil's maid that she does not intend to return. She complained that the workload is unbearable as the house is bigger (just 200 sq ft bigger?!?) after we moved at end Dec to be 3 mins walk to my son's school. She said going up and down the lift 6 times a day is really a chore (?!?!) but she didn't think that in new place the rubbish chute is now in the kitchen, no need to walk out all the way to throw rubbish? Recently I also heard that she called our agent in Jan and hinted she intend to quit. I guess she was also hoping that he will help her get another job here in a few months time.
For her first year and 8 months, she had to follow my kids to my mom's place. For last 3 months of 2010, we had the school bus pick up 2 elder boys from our flat while the baby stayed back with her. During this time, we were sold our flat and was moving out by Dec, so she got really slack and some days she didn't sweep the floor! But I let it slide, because she did help me alot with the packing.
End of Part 1
Beware of Lilibeth Mundo Vergara
Her typical weekday at new condo:
6.30am wake up
8.00am make milk for 3 yr old and prepare breakfast for all of us
9.45am prepare 2 younger boys for school
10.15am bring them down, lift just outside my front door and sch bus stops 20 steps from our lift lobby
11am cook lunch for 3 boys and herself
12.30pm walk 3 mins to pri sch with eldest boy (he feeds and bathes himself)
12.30pm to 2.45pm her free time, she can eat lunch, take a break, do housechores
2.45pm pick up 2 boys from sch bus
3.00pm serve them lunch
3.00pm to 6.00pm the 3 yr old would nap for 2 hrs
6.00pm prepare simple dinner - 1 dish and 1 vege, soup would have been cooked in magic pot. I am very not fussy abt weekday dinner, no soup also nevermind.
- we will pick up eldest son from pri sch on the way home from work
8.00pm kids have fruits
9.00pm she will help prepare them for bed and make milk for 3 old
After 9pm she is free to use her hp, relax, sleep, whatever. I didn't allow her to have a handphone and somehow she laid hands on one a few months into her 2nd contract *sigh* But unfortunately for her, she fell out with her sister and her sister sms me to rat on her. That's how I found out! At the end, I decided not to send her home over the hp, a bit silly I thought, although I kept her fone and only let her have it on her off days in the 2nd contract.
I talk to her a lot and tried to be understanding and not overwork her. In the new place, I said to vaccuum 3 times a week and mop 3 times a week - alternate days. Weekends I will cook as my hubby and kids like to have something special, or we will go out to eat and we'll bring her along.
In Dec, we even paid for jumbo box to send her stuff home. Cost us $145 but we thought it was a reward for her staying on for 2 contracts and we thought she would complete. She was trying to build a new house next to her parents place to get away from the husband. I gave her tons of household stuff which she wanted and my family and friends gave clothes and bags and things - some used, some new!
I won't say I am the best employer but I treated her fairly. Her current salary is $380 with day off and I am aware that new filipino maids can command up to $450 and I did mention to her that I will adjust her pay by year end.
End of Part 2
Beware of Lilibeth Mundo Vergara
What I am very mad is that I think she knew she wanted to leave but chose to do it after CNY as she knows my friends and family are generous - this year she collect $170 ang pows! She didn't even have the decency to call and inform me that she wasn't coming back. I had to call and check if it is true, 2 weeks after she left. Now I have to wait another 4 weeks for a new maid. If she had told me she wanted to quit, I wouldn't have bought 2-way air ticket and would keep her until new maid is here.
What send shivers down my spine is that this person goes with us to church and prays with us every Sunday can be such a liar. We are Catholics and so is she. I will scold my boys and argue with my hubby but honest to God, I never raise my voice to my maids. To me, they are afterall just salaried workers. Last year I even helped to ask my agent to get her sister a job in SGP!
My 1st and current agent is good, he does his best to find a good match. My maid wasn't bad for first 2 years, but went downhill in the 3rd year. In between the 2 maids he introduced (1st and last), I tried out another agent - Abel and Joe network /1st Choice Pte Ltd. Everyone beware - this is agent from Hell.
Final - Part 3
Anyone can help? How to tackle stubborn maid. My maid is hardworking but the only problem is she's too stubborn. She refuse to listen to some of our instructions even if it is for her own interest.
1. I ask her not to hang the washed clothes using hangers outside the window. The clothes fell off easily but that's not my concern. I am worried that if she tries to pick up the clothes and accidentally fall out of the window.
2. I ask her to eat at the table but she insist on eating at the kitchen sink. I told her that it is not clean to eat there and she may fall sick.
3. I told her to let us know whenever she needs to throw rubbish outside the house. What if someone dash in and rob or stab her while she's outside. I can't even save her because i don't know that she's outside.
4. I told her to let me know if she wants to eat, bath etc so that i can help to look after the baby. She doesn't tell me and i would presume she is with the baby which she is not.
Please help....
Hi Joan, my maid also same, lack of common sense. Can you imagine when it is raining, she hangs the laundry out to dry. I ask her to take a look at other household, did she notice anybody doing that? Not only the clothes will not dry, the rain water may not be clean.
And when i tell her if it rains close the window and when there is no rain she may open the window. Guess what, she doesn't do it even when the rain had flood the kitchen. she still leaves it open.
how about you hang your maid's own clothes outside when it is raining ? this should get the point across unless she has mental case.
I am wondering if I should give my maid off-days although i have stated upfront no off-days and no handphones. My concern is that when you give them off-days, later they ask for handphones. End up they would be making friends outside and too distracted to focus on working and problems would emerge. That is my experience with first maid. I cannot risk it as I am having a toddler and a baby and no adult supervision during office hours.
Would it be good to give the maid some time off to wander by herself like an 1hour or two when my elder go for enrichment courses in a shopping mall for example ? She is hardly one month old with us and already planning to shop around with her first month pay (lilke $30).
Littlefly
Littlefly
Personal opinion... I will rather keep to the term in contract, that is no offday. Afterall, maid is only a month with you. Have yet to see how her performance and really know her. So, I would rather be safe than sorry.
Like my maid, who is still paying off her loan and has no offday during loan period. She is awared of this term. Yet, 2 months ago, just barely a month with me, asked me for advance offday. I rejected her and explained to her that I rather keep to the terms of contract even though she claimed she was thinking of swoping for advance offday. I said no one can tell what will happens in the future, what if the work relationship did not work out before the loan period.
Also, your maid is only a month with you, yet think of offday when she knows jolly well that she is not entitled to, plus with no money... somehow, it does show what she is more interested in.
I would suggest that if she really proves herself in future, you can then consider to give her off day.
Annie
littlefly,
if your contract states No Off day for your maid(presumably she's indo maid),stick to this rule. She's with you just over a month. Once you start giving your maid too much liberties, she will expect more from you. However,If she performs well in her chores and has good attitude,perhaps you may want to reward her by taking her out to the mall for lunch and to let her walk around. BUT you must be with her. Do not let her wander off by herself. This is where trouble starts to brew. Your maid will appreciate that you took precious time off( perhaps on a sat) to bring her out so that she's not stuck at home day in and day out.
Annie,
When maid performs better,it would be more prudent to bring maid out with you rather than give her an outright day off. Maid will be appreciative and happy just to be out of the house even for a short while. You dont know the hassle you will get into once she gets an off day.
firefly
firefly
I know what you mean. Though I personally preferred maids not to have off day. But again, no off day does not mean maids would be safe from bad influence. Somehow, they get to meet other maids along somewhere and would be influenced. It's just a matter whether it is good or bad influence. I have a previous maid who do not have off day. We let her use the house phone to make call home to phil. But she always rejected the offer. But somehow, she still got to know other maids along the way when she fetched my daughter from school, during marketing etc.
It's not that I want to restrict my maids from socialising. I alway make it a point to advise them to mingle with the right group of friends.
But seriously, I guess all this still depends on the maid herself, her character.
In any case, we cannot control their thought/mind.
Annie
Thanks Annie and Firefly for your helpful advises! :)
So far, we do our marketing once a week and always bring her along so she gets to step out of the house. We also try to bring her along whenever we go out.
Btw, does your maid watch TV together with the family ? What do they do after they finishes work at night ? I gave her old magazines and cook books to read.
Do you chat with your maid often to keep her sanity in check given that they don't have off-days and handphone ?
Littlefly
Hi, I m the one who posted about my maid hanging clothes outside the window when it rains. The problem is she did indeed hang her own clothes out when it rains. I really dunno wats wrong wif her. Btw. I also posted the earlier post that she is very stubborn refuse to listen to our instruction. However, i cant deny she is hardworking, she wakes up at 5am (on her own wish) to do housework. In short, she is just like a robot, work and work but sad to say no common sense and weird as she doesnt want to listen to certain things which is for her and our interest. Do you have any advice? She is still on loan, dunno if i should change her. What if i get someone worst especially those with social problem.
Bee
Hi Tamarind, i have a new maid to help me look after my baby and do some housework.
She is very weird. She does all the work listed on the time-table promptly. She is good in mopping and cleaning the kitchen. But some simple instruction or i would say basic habits she can't follow regardless us telling her several times.
Some examples are:
1. She does not close the baby milk tin back properly. She just briefly cover it.
2. She does not seal back the cover of the wet tissue. She leaves it unseal after use.
3. She leaves the switches on after using the appliances.
4. She throw wet towels into the basket.
5. After the baby shit on her pants, she leaves the pants in the basket to wash the next day.
6. If it rains, she does not close the window.
7. Even her own biscuit container she leaves it open after eating.
8. When she throw rubbish, she doesnt even aim properly into the dustbin. And worst of all she didnt even realise she threw out of the dustbin.
I think she is either can't be bothered, lack of common sense or she really think its ok because she does all these everyday in her country.
Is it common that new maids are like that or is she a extreme case. What do you think is the possibility of her behavior? What can you advise to help? I had tried reminding her verbally many times and i even stick reminder notes everywhere. I believe even if she is forgetful she still won't miss it when she see the notes right in front of her. What should i do?
MF
Hi I have just arrived this week and have found a fillipino maid, 28 sterting work monday morning.
Reading your posts about how troublesome some maids are, I am wondering is it better I start on a very formal basis?
Am I better to make her wear a uniform from the beginning to make her feel the part and me to see her as my maid and to keep it that way. Also does any households require their maids to curtsey as when I lived in Monaco many households still have this as a house-rule for their female staff?
Why not?
Hi Sarah Bellinger,
To wear uniform or not depends on you and the rules of your family.
Generally, those rich and powerful would want their maids to wear uniform as they have more maids but it's not a practice here for commmon households.
If you want to practice curtsey in your family its fine provided you inform the maid prior to starting work and also the house rules of your family. The Japanese do theirs openly in public because it's their tradition but I've not seen others do so.
As the saying goes - when in Rome do what the Romans do.
Since you're new here and you're having a new maid it's better to start the relationship on a formal ground. Some maids may take advantage if you're too friendly in the beginning.
Hi Littlefly
It's not that I do not allow my maid to watch TV. But the problem is she does not know how to prioritise her work. Often, she ends up working till past 10, even that was her official time to rest. I have been advising her to work faster, in fact with all my past maids too. But they do not seem to listen.
So, end up, I give up talking to them about working faster so that they have time to rest.
I used to chat with my maid, past and current. But now I avoid talking to them unnecessary. Some of them are just not sincere in their chat with you.
I have a previous maid, who would ask to read my magazine, newspaper.
Basically, for now, I just let them do what they want.Frankly, I kind of afraid of being too friendly with them. As with past experiences, they have the tendency to climb over your head.
Annie
Hi MF
Actually, you are not alone. I believe a lot of employers faced the same problems which you have. The same goes for me.
My maid gave wrong dosage of medication to my two girls. First time, it was double the dosage for cough medication to my elder girl. Second time, for sinus medication, instead of twice a day, she gave 3 times a day. Even though this is something which she has been doing it daily for the 4 mths with me. She is said to be an experienced maid with 4 yrs of working experience in Singapore.
I have to remind her and keep repeating various instructions too. Many times, I got so frustrated with this. So, now I have implemented this rule. I will deduct $5 for the mistakes she made, after 3 chances.
I told maid that I have tried all ways, reminding, sticky notes, scolding... but none helped. I told maid that I believe she won't learn to remember unless she feels the pinch herself. The only way to make her feel the pinch is to deduct her pay. This is the only way I can think of now to make her be responsible and I am really sick and tired of having to repeat myself daily.
Annie
Hi
My Filipino maid of 18 days left on her own accord because my mother does not like her (no scolding as my mother does not speak English nor abuse - mother was hosipalised for 6 weeks in Feb/Mar). I am entitled to only 1 replacement and agency insist this will be considered 1 replacement. I do not agree but agency is very adamant. In this case, I feel the maid can be circulated to many employers while agency keeps earning their fee! What protection does employer get? Does MOM have guidelines to protect us? Anyone can comment or give me advice?
Everybody can image how difficult it is to take care of a hospitalised patient.
Hi Annie,
thanks for the suggestion. Sometimes when i have similar senario like yours. One of it was I told her to sit the baby in an upright position to feed her cereal so that the baby will not get choke. But because my baby has this weird habit that she doesn't like to sit still. She just simply put her on the bed lying down with some toys and feed her. I asked her would she like it if others do the same to her child knowing the danger involved. She just smiled and forget about it the next moment. Again and again the next time she still insist of doing it. Very stubborn.
Apparently now i think i know the answer to her behavior. She simply cant be bothered. She just like to take shortcuts.
She also take for granted when we treat her good. eg. let her have lunch first while we take care of the baby. After her lunch she just sits down and read newspaper on the sofa, totally forgot that we are still waiting for her to take over so that we can have our lunch.
MF
Hi
My maid will initially always show black face when I corrected her mistakes. She is stubborn & dont think she is at fault. So I will continue to nag at her until she understand.
Nowadays she use a different approach, she will just giggle or smile when I told her off, so there is nothing I can do about it. I am so annoyed that I told her hey, stop smiling/gigging when I am correcting your errors, its very rude. You just have to keep quiet listen, and tell me you disagree/agree, no need to giggle.
Now she get it.
We really have to set house rules on what we expect.
Hi, i had 2 maids and both also like to smile and walk away everytime i confront their mistake. Whenever they do that i will tell them its not funny because it can lead to serious problem. I seriously think sometimes its a trick that the agency or their fellow mates taught them. "Never admit your mistakes all the time otherwise you will be transferred away" You know sometimes they think they are smart to think of all kinds of tricks and shortcuts. The truth is they are so naive. We had been staying at our place for so long, how can we not know which task is not done correctly.
Hi Anonymous and Anonymous
Your maid black face you don't like. Your maid with smiling face you also don't like.
How to please you?
Travelmate said...
Hi Anonymous and Anonymous
Your maid black face you don't like. Your maid with smiling face you also don't like.
How to please you?
===========================
I can understand this scenarios, cos my maid also like that. Hey, it is not that we don't like. Perhaps Travel mate you have yet to encounter such scenarios before. But at times, you can feel that maid is just simply out to challenge or provoke you further.
Annie
Thks Annie for understanding. Actually, many times the mistakes they make also concern their safefy. I m teaching them to work safely. Infact, i had been constantly telling myself to be gracious to maids because i always believe in one thing "we are all human beings, if you be nice to others, people will do the same to you" But isn't it obvious now that the maid do not return this kindness to you.
Hi Annie
Quote
"..... Perhaps Travelmate you have yet to encounter such scenarios before. But at times, you can feel that maid is just simply out to challenge or provoke you further......"
Do you know why you've such scenarios? If you can answer the question correctly then your problems will most likely be minimized.
Hi Travelmate
Why is it necessary to analyse what is the reason now?
Isn't it obvious that it is attitude problem?
Annie
Ok Annie
Here's why.
Almost 100% of the time employers always fault the maid, no? Read this blog, KiasuParents etc
How many employers here and elsewhere would admit that it's their fault that they do not have a comprehensive system in the needs identification, selection, training, problem resolution, rewards and counselling, monitoring etc, in short, a management system of their maid?
Isn't this the root cause problem of the employer rather than the maid?
In fact, many so called 'experienced" employers
(i.e. employers who've have gone through many maid hirings) should by now have minimal issues with their maid because of the lessons-learnt from their previous hirings.
I admit any new employer (including myself previously) needs a few hirings and firings before coming to terms that there's no perfect maid. But that does not give an employer an excuse that he/she does not know how to better select a maid after a few hirings, right?
Employing a maid is like playing shares in the market. You either win, lose or stay put. Making an inexperienced decision would means your chances of winning is only 33.3%. Doing your homework like attending couurses in stocks and shares, getting proper sdvice, analyzing the market, analyzinig past history, studying the environment etc would increse your chances of winning beyong 33.3%.
So do employing a maid.
Alot of tips on how to manage a maid. However, I realised after reading so many tips...at the end of the day, if the employer does not want to be against the law..he/she better find a new maid. If not, just endure and accept. Most of the comments I read is always about employer not treating maid as humans or the other extreme when Maid steals, beat child,etc.
There are also scenario where Employer treats maid as a human employee, but Maid always makes mistake, broke/spoil your items every other day, forgetul, lazy, dirty,etc even after training for many, many months. The answer?..change Maid?. sigh...do you think one have a Maid means rich??. of course not. And moreover, now adays changing maid is very expensive. And moreover, the Maid can transfer and send to other families too easily. So, no problem for the maid. We always think maid is getting cheap,etc. But you must think, they do not have to spend on anything here, everything is paid for, food, logging,etc. The Money they get maybe small here, but certainly big in their country. I remember my maid once told me, the heroine of their country is Maid coming back from Overseas being rich.
Hi all,
Correct me if I am wrong, I do not think that MOM has any protection against Employers. They only set rules to protect the maid and asked that we follow them. The problem is because of a few abusive Employers leading to strong lobbying by the maid's country and politically all these rules cames out. Poor non-abusive employers, we have no protection, only can change Maid, but even changing Maid (5 times a year)can lead to counselling sessions. Probably Banned from hiring too, very strange, why can't an employer change employee?. as long as no abuse, why not? where is the human rights for Employer since we are always talking about rights?. Maids got rights, employer should too. Why must the base thinking is that all Employers are potential Abusers?. why not let the "market" work on it's own?. Set the punishment for BOTH employer and EMPLOYEE.
Travelmate,
Strange to say that we do not have COMPREHENSIVE SYSTEM, etc..of course we do not have!. Should we?. Most of us are just normal people, you think all who hire maids are HR experts?. or similar?. Firstly, what constitues comprehensive in the first place?. who to decide?. And secondly, does it mean that if one do not have one, then please don't hire a Maid and let them suffer???. Maybe you can charge free and give us your COMPREHENSIVE SYSTEM bible so that all of us are trained...and what if we follow exactly (subjective again) and the Maid still the same?. then?..CHANGE MAID right? what is the diff?.
Can anybody update me on the latest development in hiring a Maid, I understand that Employer have to pay the fees for the Agent instead of the Maid loaning from their salary. Is that correct?. when is it effective?
Hi Anonymous
Next time leave a name, ok?
Quote
"Strange to say that we do not have COMPREHENSIVE SYSTEM, etc..of course we do not have!. Should we?. Most of us are just normal people, you think all who hire maids are HR experts?. or similar?. Firstly, what constitues comprehensive in the first place?. who to decide?. And secondly, does it mean that if one do not have one, then please don't hire a Maid and let them suffer???. Maybe you can charge free and give us your COMPREHENSIVE SYSTEM bible so that all of us are trained...and what if we follow exactly (subjective again) and the Maid still the same?. then?..CHANGE MAID right? what is the diff?."
I'm not in HR either.
Do you need a maid management system? It depends on you! How comprehensive you want it to be and whether a written document is required also depends on you and your family needs.
However, there's a simple formula, here
X = your commitment and involvement
Y = your mate's commitment and involvement
Z = a maid management system
X + Y + Z = high probability of getting the right maid
Notes
a) You'll need a minimum of 2 or more components in order for the forumla to work effectively
b) No guarantee that your maid will stay with you forever as the formual does not address conditions outside of the family
There're many people here (and elsewhere) who've many issues with their maid. This formula is a good start for those who're genuinely interested in reducing the money wasted, time and energy in the hiring and managing of their maid. This formula is NOT applicable to those who practices hire and fire of maid.
Travelmate, the anonymous(s) are of various person.
Quote
"Travelmate, the anonymous(s) are of various person."
Yes, I'm aware of this. It makes answering questions difficult without quoting their problems.
Haiz, even till now after trying everyone's advice. Sadly my maid still has no common sense.
Recently i realise she uses the dishes cloth to wipe the dust on the shelve and then use it back to wipe the plates. I already gave her 2 seperate cloth (diff colour) to use and told her many times. Its simple what, i asked her would you like to eat dust on your plate? It's not hard to understand right???
And my baby just switch her milk powder recently so i told her to use the new one now. Dunno why the tin of milk put right in front of her she still make the effort to go and take out the old milk powder (which i hide somewhere) to use. She's even a mother of 2. I wonder how she raise her kids "drinking random baby food and eating dusk"
And recently i also realise that my furniture and floor were full of damages because she simple drag the chairs, playpen etc.
Some people say make her pay for the damage so that she will learn. But knowing they earning so little, i don't have the heart to do so (even though my damage had accumulated to a thousand already).
But again being nice and telling her properly doesn't work. Do i really have to do it the hard way to her then she will listen?
Sometimes, they are really the one pushing the limit.
MF
MF
I can fully understand how you feel. I am facing the same situation too. Time and time again, repeated myself to maid.
Many times, I feel talking to a kid instead of a 30+ adult.
Annie
Hi MF and Annie
The reason why both of you are facing the same problems (even after repeated hirings) is because both of you got the wrong hires in the first place, no?
If you've followed my Basic Formula described earlier I strongly believe you'll face less problems with your maids.
Never mind you can try it on your next hire.
Travelmate & Annie,
So far i only had 2 maids and both are exactly the same. The 1st one besides all these behavior, she also abuse my baby so i had to change her.
You know the thing about these 2 maids is that you can't say they are not clever because there are many times when they take shortcuts.
Like this current one about the milk powder incident, she can even secretly notice where i put the old one.
It's really weird right, sometimes they are so smart while other times they seem completely hopeless.
Not that i mistreat them, i buy titbits for them every week and during xmas or new year i would give them presents.
Of course at home with all those silly mistake i have to say them but i never scold.
So what is wrong? I consider myself treating them fairly well.
MF
Hi MF
Quote
"So what is wrong? I consider myself treating them fairly well."
Let's start with the selection process.
What I meant was did you select your maid properly in the 1st place? How do you go about in selecting the maid to meet your needs i.e. what criteria do you based on? You depend on agent recommendation or you personally selected her from a shortlist? Was your spouse involved in the selection process?
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